/ media

Juggy Kitchen

<p>Uhm, I just got home from work and, what with it being friggin&#8217; Saturday and all, I needed some mindless fun.  Flipping through the channels, I landed on HGTV&#8217;s &#8220;Designer&#8217;s Challenge&#8221;.  I enjoy watching this show, mainly because the designers invent new words when they make their presentations.  </p>

<p>I was in time for the introductory segment, wherein we learn the horrible plight of the homeowners.  Their million dollar home has a kitchen that lacks Good Circulation, has Poor Natural Lighting, or&#8212;god forbid&#8212;both.  As I watch the rundown, I notice the male homeowner bears a striking resemblance to <a href="http://www.comedycentral.com/tv_shows/themanshow/">The Man Show</a>&#8217;s Jimmy Kimmel.  Could it be?  Co-host of a show that is the most obvious assault on the male weakness(es) in the name of commercialism running on television today, sitting in his kitchen with his WIFE, and the KIDS playing in the background??!!!</p>

<p>The happy voice-over lady did in fact confirm that this was the Kimmel household.  That was Jimmy.  But there were no Juggy Girls anywhere.  Everyone was wearing regular clothes, no-one was gyrating, and the only silicone  in evidence was the lube on the cabinet-drawer rails.  </p>

<p>So I&#8217;m watching the first hack make his(her?) presentation, and Mr Man Show is conspicuously absent from the judging panel.  Happy Voice-Over Lady even made a statement about that; she said &#8220;with Jimmy at &#8216;the office&#8217;, Mrs. Kimmel listened to the presentations&#8221;.  </p>

<p>I don&#8217;t know about you, but I was laughing my ass off.  Apparently, Mrs. Kimmel entertained some interior designers while Jimmy interviewed strippers for Juggy Girl slots.  </p>

<p>In the end, The Kimmels got a lovely Tudor-style kitchen, Jimmy tossed a few zingers on-camera, and everyone had a good time.  Breakfast at the Kimmel home is certainly more orderly now, with the butcher block peninsula.  Thank God.</p>

<p>But what I want to see is the Juggy Girl demo reel from the auditions on presentation day, the presentations that Jimmy had to miss.  Best part is the verbiage used by Happy Voice-over Girl  to describe Jimmy&#8217;s absence.  She claimed he was &#8220;tied up at the office&#8221;.</p>

<p>Uh huh.</p>