Bil
Bil (yes, with one l) was a roommate of mine in college. He loved Stevie Nicks. He was a professional clown, with the big shoes, the red ball nose, the striped shirt, the magic tricks and balloon animals. He’d come home on Saturday afternoons, exhausted from yet another gig trying to get six year-olds to pay attention to him for a few hours, and slump into one of the many ratty couches we had arrayed around the living room/dance floor. He’d fling his feet up on the coffee table and let out a big sigh, but it was impossible to feel empathetic, because his feet were two feet long, got wider at the toes, and were bright red. He’d leave the clown shoes on, you see.
Bil dressed up as Maude Findlay for our Halloween party one year—no, he became Maude for our Halloween party one year. And when our landlord showed up in the wee hours of that night, threatening to call the cops on us, Bil/Maude said “god’ll get you for that, Frank”, and slammed the door in his face. (I realize I’m getting into reference obscurity of the Dennis Miller-level, but those who recognize the essence of the line are probably laughing hard right now.)
Bil & I and several other friends performed together on stage—in an improv group, dinner theatre, and mainstage productions at our school.
Bil was the only person who could compete with my farts. He always blamed his gas on the diabetes.
Bil’s diabetes was diagnosed while we were roommates. The day he was diagnosed, he flew through the doors of our house and demanded that all of us assembled in the living room at the time plan his funeral immediately. Of course we obliged. Dawn recalled the details today:
- There were to be no small sausage finger foods of any kind
- The casket was to be enshrouded in a dry ice/Rosco fog
- Stevie Nicks’ “Stand Back” was to play whenever anyone got too close to the floral arrangements
- There was to be a specially rigged “trip seam” in the carpet that we could use to fling undesirables directly into the casket
Bil ate a salad while we planned these things.
I doubt any of these mandates will actually be implemented, but unfortunately we will find out soon enough. Bil passed away in a hospital in Los Angeles this past weekend. I still don’t know if it was the diabetes, or if that was just an accomplice in some other medical conspiracy. I just know that ever since I got a call from Kathy this afternoon, I’ve been riding a wave of highs and lows.
Bye, Bil. You will be missed.
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Bil, goddammit, I will miss you every day. It seems like a lifetime ago we lived in a series of too-small apartments in Philly and then NYC, and I can still hear your voice saying “I gotta get up at the crack of my crack” or “Listen to me, nothin for nothin but…” or complaining because i didn’t do the dishes.
Bil made me frost his hair. I wish I could do it now in the kitchen in the Venue house (with a rug in it)and then throw a party, with lots of kegs (that never get returned and become an end table) and some REM and the Pixies on the stereo from Bill Thomas’ mixed tapes.
I could sit on the counter in some ungodly Brat Pack outfit and Dawn could mysteriously leave for an hour and then come back from God knows where and Lauren and I could hide from someone (whoever was bothering us, usually Rob)in the upstairs bathroom,with the color photo of C Everett Koop over the toilet. Miriam, Darryl and Dianna might stop by from next door to borrow a cup of beer and never leave and in the morning, we might wake up to find Darryl in the rugless living room having a beer and looking very chalky.
He might be with Bill Thomas, having a sloe gin fizz being poured from a pot or pan from Mount Dishmore in the sink.
Lauren would then fall down a flight of stairs and go call Donna, who would have spent the night, drinking a jug of 6 dollar wine.
Tim Gerds would also be nursing some pain, after drunk driving his ten speed.
Of course, Ellen Winkler would be there, rubbing her own breasts and fluffing her hair. She would be frenching John Genovese, who might be chasing Kathy, who might be flirting with someone, until Bil sashayed by and gave the biggest zit on her face a name. And, Bil would bring down the party and disappear for a week and come back tan. Come back, now, Bil, tanned and rested and tell us about Helen and her melons and the rest of the 70 year old adoring fans that you work with at Strawbridge and we’ll go get some slices, “like a family”
Wow. The last time I saw Bil, I was standing at the stage door in the freezing cold on the last night EVER of “Angels in America”, waiting to see Dan Futterman.
Out of the blue I hear that familiar, excited screaming voice of Bil’s, who was across the street and noticed me SOMEHOW in the throng. He was screaming “Oh my G-d, it’s Ellen Winklah!” We chatted for a minute and he was focused on meeting Dan Futterman himself.
Bil was a larger-than-life person who made all of us who were lucky to know him laugh and laugh. He was a part of our college family, demanding attention and pushing every boundary he could, always with a devilish smile and a wink. Who couldn’t love him?
So many memories of him. So many laughs. Sharing our stories of him will make us relive our brief but blessed time spent with Bil. And having him remain the center of attention, even now, would make him smile.
Wow, what a shock. Bil will always be one of those people that will live on forever in my mind. A very
gifted comedian,
I really got to know him post-Glassboro doing murder mysteries with Miriam, (Scott)and the gang. He never ceased to crack me up-where did he get all that material? Great with
the ad libs and very upbeat person.
The last time I saw Bil was on The
Speedline around Haddonfield
some time last spring…we were
rushed, but there was a hypnotizing
glint in his eye and a contagious
smile on his face :))
Ricky
I remember the impressions he did. Bad impressions. Especially of Diana Ross. We were setting up for some show on the Mainstage and Bil came out with some ridiculous wig, (not at all looking like Diana) sauntered center stage oblivious to all who were setting up, and started singing “Ain’t No Mountain High Enough” while strutting .
I give him a D for the material but an A++++++ for balls.
He once made me apologize to his Stevie Nicks poster for blowing smoke in her face.
He’d get me to come over by promising to make mimosas…I’d arrive to find him pouring ginger ale and tang over ice.
He once went with me to Crabtree and Evelyn for a part time job interview. I ended up owing the owner twenty dollars as he mistook the bowl of potpouri for free snacks.
One stoned night he told me if he could be any one of the gals, he’d be me because I was so fabulous. Over the course of the evening I overheard him say the same thing to Kathy, Ellen, Ellen and Lauren.
He adored us…I will miss him.
If I remember correctly, wasn’t he an awfully big Ricky Lee fan too?
Two things I just thought of today:
– when I spoke to Bil sometime earlier this year after buying a house, he said in that patented Bil way, “I can’t believe you and Diana are HOMEOWNERS and I’m still just a HOMO!”—It still cracks me up.
– At home I have a video Val sent a while back entitled “Our Little Family” and I am almost afraid to pop it in and watch because I know there will be lots of footage of Bil and all of us goofing around for Val’s new video camera, circa 1990. I will watch it though, soon.
For the record, I never rubbed my breasts. Bil did—especially on stage. Others did. But me? Never. Chris Pecci started that vicious, vicious rumor by recording it in the Venue log.
Could you blame me if I did, though? They were FABULOUS.
Could I have forgotten Rob in my last diatribe?
Rob and Bil were the best together. Bil wanted to be chased by Rob all around the house and he would hide in my and Lauren’s room. He broke our door, running from Rob. Then, Rob might come in and try and get Lauren and I to play the strip darts that Mouse gave me for Christmas. Bil loved Mouse and wanted to help her buy T tops.
Bil would come in our room and ask us if his ankles were fat and argue the merits of the word “bootleg” and if it would ever become a catch phrase.
Thanks to Bil, it is, and I still use it once a day.
Thanks to you Rob for giving everyone this forum for remembering Bil and all of your wonderful antics at Venue house. I was a party to some of it, most of it third party through Rob’s stories.
Bil is being missed, and will continue to be missed, by all of you who loved him.
I am so sorry for the loss to each of you.
Christina (Rob’s sister)
Bil and I didn’t know each other very well when we became roommates in Philadelphia. He was more Miriam’s friend than mine. For the first couple of months in that apartment, he was away, at one of his many jobs. When he moved in at the end of the summer, Val and Miriam and I were all settled in and I felt a little invaded by the manic presence of this new roommate. Then one night the girls were out, and Bil and I sat at the kitchen table, which had belonged to the mother of Frank Cloak, our former landlord before being pilfered by all of us and moved to Philly. We had a long, long chat, talking about our families, religion, sexuality, and we were feeling very close, for the first time, when a very fat mouse ran across our kitchen floor. We let out identical squeals and as one, we climbed up on the benches we were sitting on and put our butts on Mrs. Cloak’s lovely table. We sat there, somewhat panicked, for close to an hour before Miriam and Val came home to “save” us from the mouse.
He was so kind, and so incredibly funny. I’m sad.
Even now, Bil keeps us all laughing with these stories even though we all want to cry.
Over the years, I’ve always brought up hilarious stories about Bil to people who had never met him. Most of my post-college friends know him as “that clown I lived with in college.”
On Tuesday, I first remembered how Bil would come into the room that Kathy and I shared in the Venue house and stand in front of our full-length mirror and say, “Oh my god, my ankles look fat.” And he would come home from a hard day of clowning and collapse on the couch, exhausted. He always ate a huge Tupperware container of salad for dinner because he was always dieting. And he was always lifting his shirt up and shooting his belly with insulin while Kathy and Rob and I were eating. And he loved flirting with my frat boy brother Gerald and making him nervous. Just last year, Bil was joking in e-mail about how Gerald was the one that got away.
And there was the time that Bil Garrity accompanied me to the Atlantic City premiere of Rip Taylor’s revue, Rip Roarin’. At the after party, I interviewed Rip for Atlantic City magazine. Bil was so proud that Rip, clad in a huge, sparkly sweater emblazoned with Lucile Ball’s face, grabbed me, the 21-year-old college intern, from the crowd of haggard middle-aged reporters and took me by the arm for the rest of the night. Bil kept shooting me these sly looks while he flirted with the show’s dancers.
And I’m so happy we spent time together in NYC in the early ‘90s, when he lived with Mim in Chelsea and on 16th St. He was always running out to Morton’s or Five Guys Named Moe or one of his many jobs, like Diana said. He always threw me a quip as flew around the tiny apartment, primping for the evening.
The last time I saw Bil, in L.A. in 2000, he was dressed in drag as Ginger from “Gilligan’s Island” for this murder mystery show at Sacred Fools. The heels and big red wig made him look 6’5’’. And I can still hear that breathy voice, “Oh, Skipper…” He stole the show, natch.
But I also remember the time I was in Hollywood in 2002 for a pre-business vacation with Bill Thomas, and we played phone tag and missed each other even though we were around the corner from each other. We should have met no matter what. I missed out. But I’m so glad he made me laugh for 15 years.
Does anyone remember how Bil insisted on “crossing swords” in the downstairs bathroom off the kitchen at the Venue House? I mean, I guess I was naive enough to think he wasn’t gay (even though I did question myself when he told me my boyfriend “had a nice little picnic basket there, girlfriend”), but he was always the one who begged the guys to come pee with him. It was an event, not to be missed.
Another memory was his infamous character, Russ Stardust, when we all performed in G.I.G., the improv group. Russ was his creation, a lounge singer who’s star had barely risen, but sure had fallen. Many of the opening, prepared skits we did were around Russ and his silent piano player, played by Jeff. And he was amazing as the villain in Carolyn O’Donnell’s “Getting Out”,
Sigh. Very sad. I just watched the video I referenced in other emails of Bil and many of us in an actor’s workshop from ‘89. Man, he was funny.
None funnier, in fact.
Well, Ellen: naive, you were most certainly that.
My gaydar was honed from an early age, between my mother working in the interior decorating world—home to zero straight male practicioners of the craft—and my own years in the theatre. Coupled with both of my parents’ open mindedness and dare I say it Liberalism, I have always been able to ID a fag faster than Fabio.
And that is one of the things that I think hurt my relationship with Bil. Because as we were spending all this time together, between classes and rehearsals and just being roommates, I just knew he was gay, but it hurt me that he could never feel he could come out to me about it. Today I realize that I am the idiot, that I had it easy. Who the hell ever has to confide with their parents, their family, their friends, with the stunning news that they are straight?
And so what? So what. Exactly.
Eventually, it seems, some of our dear friends from school found the courage to come out of the closet they were living in, and Bil was among them.
I found this out about Bil approximately seven years ago (which would be the last time I ever saw him). I was waiting to meet Brenda in front of a theatre on Second Avenue in freezing-ass weather, and here comes this guy who slips on the ice and almost wipes out. The guy makes this gay-ass face as he regains his composure, and looks at me, and at the same time we go: “Bil/Rob?”
Turns out, Bil’s waiting for his date too, to see the same show. Brenda shows up, as does Bil’s date, who happens to be a guy. The thing is, Bil proceeds to introduce us to his date as comfortably as could be. Was this the Bil I lived with? No, it wasn’t. This Bil was new, and I was so happy for him. The four of us had dinner together, and Bil & I caught up on what we had been doing in the intervening years since graduation. I couldn’t help but notice how comfortable Bil was, how happy he seemed. I smiled a lot that night.
I have a very vivid memory of that night. The warmth of the restaurant, the steam rising from the manholes in the street outside; the brick walls, the good food, the good company. How happy I was for Bil.
How sad I am now.
I had said that I never knew Bill that well but I always thought he was a nice guy and I remember he could always get a laugh out of anyone. It’s obvious that I missed out on a lot. It seems he did pretty well for himself, when you consider how many people he touched.
I never ran into Bil when I lived in NYC. Joe Austin on the other hand was practically up my ass I ran into him so much :) But Bil and I never did. It wasn’t until we both moved out to Los Angeles that we met up again.
I had been in LA for almost a year and was at an Adult Awards Show (multiple nominations thankyouverymuch) and I was walking into the bar and who should I run into but Bil. We screamed, we laughed, we hugged, we then both laughed even more that I was in the adult industry. Immediately he wanted to know the specifics of all the hot naked men I knew.
Shortly after seeing him there I went back to NYC. It was a tiny, crowded bar in the East Village and through the smoke filled room I spotted a clown. Bil was now blond or as he put it “Girl, it’s cinnamin, get it right!” Our goal for the night was to try and do unspeakable things to shy gay boys in public. I think we did.
Over the years we’d occasionally see each other, he’d come to the bar near my apt. in West Hollywood and we’d hang out. I would always call him when I was in Chicago visiting Kathy and he always said, “tell Kathy she owes me a drink”.
I knew of his health problems and that they weren’t very good. In and out of the hospital but through it all he was upbeat and laughing. I guess that’s where the term “tears of a clown” comes from.
It’s very comforting to know that I spoke to him so close to his death and that even if he was in tremendous pain he was still laughing and not letting it win. My last memories of him will be of laughing on the phone. And that’s how it should be.
I first met Bill while doing dinner theater. He was living together with Mim, Val and Diana.
At some point during the play my character was killed so I would spend the rest of the night in the office. Bill would visit me with really funny remarks about the audiance while I graded his papers-he was a teacher at the time.
Our dressing room was the very very small bathroom. Every night while we were dressing for the show,he would kick us out and then use the bathroom for it’s expressed purpose-it was at this point I learned the meaning of ‘courtesy flush’.
While serving the salad course he would, in character, of course yell SALAD….SALAD as a rock….and laugh just as hard every time and so would we.
Remember his learning to sign? he taught us all of the swear words.
He dropped a champagne bottle on an audiance member’s head.
His favorite phrase at this time was ‘isn’t that rich’
One night before the show started two ladies quietly made their way to the door he asked them why they were leaving and they admitted that one was diabetic and forgot her insulin-he offered his to which they applied
Gosh you guys are prepared for anything!
Lastly-Bill visited the home of my parents once and because I told him that the bathroom in the basement had a very confortable toilet seat
he kissed my Mom, who he had never met before, took the evening paper and went directly to the basement to find out for himself!
She never forgot this.
We laugh about it to this day.
I don’t know how to end this because I don’t know how to properly say ‘good by’ to him
I just don’t want to.
Although it has been years since I’ve seen or spoken to him I remembered him often and well-
now that I know he’s gone I miss him that much more,but will continue to remember him, tell his stories and in that way he’ll always be with me.
Juzzy
The last time I saw Bil was here in New York. Me, Bil and Ellen McLaughlin went out for dinner and drinks, and Bil was his usual, fabulous self. No matter what place we went into, everyone knew he was there! Even people on the street. No one was safe.
We sat and talked and I told Bil about something that had just happened to me, a rather embarrasing moment (which I will reveal when we get together for those who don’t know…it has to do with Endora from Bewitched btw) and Bil was so taken with this moment in my life, and he LOVED it so much, he told me at that moment that he was stealing it. He looked right at me and said…”That didn’t happen to you anymore. I’m stealing it. From now on, I’m telling that story and that happened to me.” He let loose that big Bil laugh, and we all laughed, and though I’ve never heard Bil’s version of “my story” I’m sure it was far more fabulous, far more insane than my version. I hope he used it well. I hope it made him happy to tell it.
The first time I met Bil was at a Venue party pre-party – he was Lauren’s new roommate. I had just started to date Daren Wicks, and was being a little secretive about it, and Bil just came up to me and told me I could use his bed if Daren and I wanted to have sex … just don’t leave a big wet spot. He was such a generous soul.
Mim and I stopped at Bil’s apartment in Vegas when I drove across the country to move to Portland. We talked about going to the Liberace museum, but it closed, Mim and I were tired from a long drive and wanted to get up early so we could get to Portland (it took 22 friggin hours) the next day. I always expected Bil would come up for a madcap, zany weekend in Portland. I did not know him as well as some, but he was such a character, so vivid, I remember him better (and more fondly) than some of the other people I went to Glassboro with and worked on the radio station or Venue for 4 years.
I can’t believe he’s not gonna be here, dammit!
Thank you all for your wonderful stories. You lifted my spirits and gave me many laughs. I met Bil in the fall of 1993 when we were in training at the infamous “Morton’s of Chicago”. We clicked right away and spent many a hard (and often times hilarious) nights slinging steaks—at what he affectionately called “Big Al’s House of Cows”. His obvious humor and charm made him a true stand out as a coworker (not to mention dear friend). It was on a busy Thursday night that his nickname was born. Bil was hustling dishes out of the kitchen and when obstructed by other waiters he yelled out: “Look out! Mama’s coming through and plates are hot. Watch your back!” And for some strange reason it just stuck. From that day forward he was known as “Mama”. On our work schedule, station chart, et al the name Bil was replaced with Mama. During a shift meeting a manager said to him, ” I don’t think it’s weird that you don’t go by your real name, or even that you call yourself Mama, I just think it’s weird that you refer to yourself in the third person.” We all had a good laugh and Bil loved being that guy on the staff. He truly turned some crappy nights into a kick in the pants, and I was grateful immediately for this larger-than-life personality that could turn my day around.
In 1996, we both decided to head west – Mama to Las Vegas and me to L.A. We remained in close touch and he stayed with me on visits here, and of course a year later made the move to L.A. himself. We were reunited as coworkers in 1997 at the Morton’s in Beverly Hills. Many employees didn’t know his real name for months. He came in that door as “Mama”. From there our lives continued to parallel when we were performing at the same theatre company, sharing stories about our sisters having babies at the same time, breakfast at IHOP because ya know—as Bil would say “Kel, they have the sugar-free Maple Syrup, and you know how I enjoy a nice sugar-free syrup” so IHOP was an obvious choice.
I also had the distinct pleasure in recent years of seeing Mama doing drag as Nancy Sinatra. He fancied “These Boots were made for Walking” wearing 5 inch vinyl boots and a big PINK cotton candyesque wig. Rich.
As much as I loved his quick wit and candor i.e. “I’m so hungry I could eat the crotch out of a low flying duck!”, I will miss his depth and genuine heart the most. He wrote me one the nicest letter that I’ve ever received when I left NY. I mentioned it to him this past June and he asked me (in true Mama form)… “Kel, I’m running out the door, but will you call back and read it on my answering machine?” I obligued, and to that end I’ll borrow from that letter and give his words back to him. The last sentence read: I will miss many people from Morton’s but I can say without pause that as Dorothy said to the Scarecrow, “I think I’ll miss you most of all.”
Bil used to call the Ellens “Ellen smellin’ watermellon”. The only purpose for this was to get a rise out of them (and all of us). No matter how many times he said it, we still used to laugh because at some point it just became rote. Here was Bil trying to get a laugh, pulling out one of his shopworn props to do so, and somehow it still worked. This was our religion, our comfort food; and Bil dished it out daily, in heaping portions.
You know those impossibly large cups of soda you can buy at the convenience stores? The ones you could bathe a small child in? Bil could sail through one of those filled with Diet Coke without batting an eyelash—but he’d bat his eyelashes anyway.
Bil was fond of saying “area rug” with this affected gutteral twang as if he were a ninety year-old Jewish man from Crown Heights. This was another bit he knew was guaranteed to get a chuckle, and he’d shoehorn it into the conversations at that all-you-can-eat joint in Glassboro, at Venue House, even on stage in the middle of an improv.
Which reminds me, Bil loved the on-stage crackup. He liked doing them, he liked causing them, and he was not above milking them, if the audience was into it. Think Tim Conway & Harvey Korman in ”’Burnett”.
Bil had no ‘off’ switch.
I just want to note how much i am laughing and crying as i read all these great remeniscences. I started reading some saved emails yesterday (not too many left, alas, as most email gets tossed after a few months) and god damn the boy could still crack me up reading his words. Funny, funny stuff.
Bil and I met at one of the Sacred Fools’ theater’s so-called “Marty Parties”. This was in Los Angeles in the winter of 1997. He later told me he hated me on sight. So of course we became fast and very close friends.
We spent night after night at the Sacred Fools theater talking about the lack of “boys” in our theater company – “the straightest theater company west of Salt Lake City” as Bil so perfectly put it. Friday nights at Akbar in Silverlake alternately complaining about our single lives and hitting on every cute boy in sight. And even later those nights at the Yukon Mining Co. on Santa Monica Blvd. again commiserating about our single lives. I never tired of his answering machine message that told all who called that “ain’t nobody here but us chickens..ain’t nobody here at all”. I watched him onstage stealing every scene he was in, whether in drag or not (ask those on the West Coast about his starring role in “Buddly Lesh: Effeminate P.I.”). I loved driving around LA with him (in his little black “jeeplet”) listening to Stevie Nicks.
Bil and I were supposed to travel together to San Francisco in June of 2000 for Gay Pride Weekend. Just a couple of “sistahs” on the town. He had to drop out because of work (Mortons of Chicago) and still insisted that I go. He helped me find a place to stay (at the apt. of a friend) and wished me luck. For the first day, I kind of stuck with his friend but that last night I decided to go out on my own—if only to have a story (I hoped) to tell Bil when I got back. That night, I met my partner Stuart. We’ve been together since. And we always joked that his not going with me that weekend was the best thing he had ever done for me.
When I needed a job, he found me one at Mortons. When I needed a car, he lent me his. When I needed a friend, he gave me his heart—always listening, always supportive, always there.
There are so many more memories of Bil and reading this brings to life so many people that Bil always spoke of so fondly: the Ellens, Darren from Las Vegas, Miriam, Paul, and so many others
Bil WAS “Mama” to those out here. Always there taking care of others, always giving more than he should have or needed to. Bil was “JakesUnk”. I cannot recount how many times Bil gushed over all of his nieces and nephews but Jake was something special. And on a more personal note, Bil was my best friend out here. He made me feel more comfortable in my own skin just because he was so comfortable in his.
I cannot even put into words how much he will be missed. I’m still in a little bit in shock.
On the West Coast, there are those of us who would like to plan a memorial for him in January. For anyone reading this (on the west side of the country), please contact me at the e-mail provided as we will be trying to get this going soon after the holidays.
We have all been blessed with the memories of (and all too brief time with) a truly unique individual.
gerald mcclanahan
gemcc2000@aol.com
I just can’t believe don’t get to see him again! It’s not fair!
Bil was a bright, shining light. He always had a smile, a kind word, something to make me laugh.
Merry and joyful, shameless and fun…I’m so glad to have known him. I wish I could tell him.
Bil was a fellow cast member with me at Caesars Magical Empire in Las Vegas. I was one of the “straight guys” in the show and a minority at that… He hit on me from day #1 and it became a running gag for the next 4 years. I always looked forward to his inappropriate comments and grab-asses. Nobody else could have gotten away with what Bil did with me. A true and classic comedian and talent, as well as a man of integrity and honest friendship. I’m a better person for knowing him and he will be missed always.
Ted
I remember Bil, my roomate Helen and myself laying in Helen’s bed in our old Apartment on 89th St singing songs…for like 3 hours…I remember when he discovered he could tune in ABC on the radio in his car (the “brand new 1988 Mercury”)and LISTEN to “One Life to Live” while he was driving (usually with his knees as one hand had a big gulp in it and the other a Carlton 100…)I remember when he got me to do a clown gig with him and when it was over he ripped the red-sponge-ball nose off my face and the end of my nose looked like W.C. Fields’ for about a week…I remember the time I drove to Sea Isle to suprise him when he was bartending at Bushes and I didn’t know that he wasn’t allowed to have guests at the place he was staying, so he smuggled me upstairs into his room and too late I realized I needed some “supplies” from the drug store – it was one of the few times Bil was at a loss for words – I’ll never forget the look of horror on his face – that he had to go to WaWa @ 3am to buy tampons for me…I remember a night in NYC when there was a huge blizzard and Bil and I were the only 2 waiters working in the city that night and he stopped by my job to walk me home and his pockets were stuffed w/money and my pockets were stuffed w/money (though not as musch as his!) and we sat and drank a few Bushmills before going out in the cold to walk the 2 blocks to my apt and we stopped to get cigarettes for him and I knock over a rack of pantyhose……I laid in bed last night with all these memories racing through my head. How sad I am that we won’t be able to make any more, how grateful I am to have all the ones I have.
I, too, met Bil at Sacred Fools in LA. He was one of the first people to embrace me at the theatre – figuratively and literally. I will never forget how his arms would envelope me completely whenever we’d hug hello or goodbye. I think I was always a little in awe of how open, how funny, how welcoming of everyone he was… and at all his “Bil-isms”, those hilarious, off the wall sayings he had which others have so fondly recounted here. “Are my ankles fat?” I don’t think anyone had ever asked me that before… or since. Bil always called me by both my names: “Hello, Denise Barnard!” “See ya later, Denise Barnard!” From him, it felt like a term of endearment.
I last saw him in Hollywood in traffic. Sitting at a light, I heard the car next to me honking wildly. I looked over and there he was, waving at me. We spoke briefly through our windows, and I drove away with a smile on my face that lasted a long time.
I didn’t know that he was such a Stevie Nicks fan. From now on, when I sing “Dreams” with my band, it goes out to Bil. I hope he likes it.
Oh, Mama.
I’ve laughed out loud so many times reading these posts. Ted, Bil hit on you mercilessly. He was the only one who could get away with that.
Bil was my roommate in Los Angles for a short time. We would blast “Chorus Line” and sing at the top of our lungs while cleaning the house. I have so many wonderful memories.
Mama was sweet, funny, crazy and and a great friend. We were lucky to have him.
I met Mama at Sacred Fools too. I was young and dumb when I met him and he encouraged me to do more than I thought I could do. Never confidentially, like he would never pull you aside and say “Aaron, we need to talk” it would always be at a party with people all over the place, and he’d scream it “Boy! Why don’t you just DO it? Quit talking about it and DO it! (and make sure there’s a part in it for your Mama)” And largely because of him, I did do it. Lots of things I never thought I could do. I wrote and directed a show (and wrote a part for my Mama), and I went backstage, and he was playing a kung fu master, and had to wear tights, and he asked “Do these tights make me look fat?” and I said, “No, Bil, your fat makes you look fat.” He claims to have never forgiven me for that. But I still got a huge hug and a warm smile and a “How’s everything going?” every time I saw him.
He also had a very endearing way to start a show that I’m sure you all remember, he would run around backstage and tell everybody “Good luck, Macbeth!” He was that kinda person. Bigger than life, and who cares what people think?
Good luck, Macbeth.
From my online journal posted tonight:
I have cried every day since I found out Tues. night that Bil died. I haven’t felt this kind of sadness that wasn’t directly tied to my immediate being in a long time. Bil was a friend to so many people. He didn’t talk to everyone every day, didn’t see them all the time. Some people hadn’t seen him in years but the memories and smiles and laughter still lived on as if they just saw him yesterday.
I miss my friend. Over the last several days many friends of ours from college and beyond have been sending emails, setting up blog sites and (me and our friend,Jeff) creating photo sites to share photos of Bil through the years and also share memories of us all from college. Those tears are filled with joy of the memories and sadness that it’s in the past.
You never really know how memorable times are or how important they are until years later. Problems that I had back then, for the most part pale in comparrison to today’s issues and problems. What seemed like the end of the world back then is a blink of an eye today. I guess with age truly does come wisdom.
The past is one of my most painful memories but also one of the best memories I will ever have. I look back mostly with fondness this week. I haven’t known a day without tears this week. At the same time, I’ve probably laughed harder than I have in years. Bil has left us with sadness but ultimately laughter which is how everyone will always and should remember him.
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Don’t forget Photos at:
http://towerblockmedia.com/public/bilgarrity/gsc.html
and
http://www.pbase.com/jbosie/gsc
I just remembered another Bilism. Instead of hasta lavista, he’d say hasta lavatory. And he’d be kinda Jerky Boys about it too, like:
“yeah, ah, hasta LAVATORY to ya there, uh, Ellen!”
I once used that at my sister’s engagement party, after her (then future- and now ex-)father-in-law just made a toast to the future bride and groom. Most of the guests were raising glases and saying “cheers”, “salut”, etc, and there I was shouting “yeah, and ah, hasta lavatory to ya there, uh, Edward!”
Oops.
I am so lost with out my birthday buddy….I knew of Bil while I lived in the Avant house in Glassboro (I remember him as Maude… we were the World Allegiance of Super Hereos) but I didn’t really know him until we had lived together in Philly. Mim and I had known each other since we were like 10——any friend of mim’s was instantly a friend of mine. I remember looking for apts. and discussing birthdays in the car. Bil said that his was July 21st and I just couldn’t believe that we had the same birthday. I immediatly formed a connection with Bil. Bil was a great roommate as well as a great person. I can’t believe he is gone. (Where does all that energy go?) The memories keep flushing in….The funny thing about Bil is that as soon as you start remembering him….you start laughing. One of the funniest memories was moving from South St to Pine. Bil helped me move my King sized matress onto the street and on to my parent’s old Mercury Station Wagon. The matress was so heavy … it just toppled down the steps… Bil was on the bottom as the monster consumed him and fell onto the unsuspecting streets. It knocked the lights out and I wet my pants laughing. Bil thank you for helping me clean after the parties, thank you for walking my dog, thank you for making me laugh. I miss you.
I was very sad to hear about our recent loss. I remember Bil as a kind, fun, and, of course, funny funny guy. He always made you smile no matter how good or bad HIS day was going.
Peace, Prayers, and Blessings.
Since I heard of Bil’s passing last week, I have been trying to pinpoint what about him made him a giant among my sister Ellen’s many friends. And as I read through these wonderful stories, I was reminded of a similar incident of meeting Bil in traffic. It was on my first visit to Sea Isle City, NJ. I was visiting some relatives of my future husband’s, heading south and in gridlock, when out of the corner of my eye I saw the person in the car going north, also in gridlock, waving frantically. Bil was on his way to work, and urged us to come by for a drink.
After our visit with the relatives we headed down to Bush’s for a beer. Bil made me an instant celebrity. He introduced me to everyone he knew there and treated me like royalty—if for no other reason than that I was Ellen’s sister.
On the few occasions I got to see Bil, he always made me feel this way—like a celebrity, like the greatest person in the world. And that’s not an easy thing to do. But it occurred to me that Bil had a gift for making a lot of people feel this way.
As I remember all the gifts I have to be thankful for this holiday season, I will count among my blessings the privilege of having known Bil.
Peace,
Maureen (McLaughlin) McGinley
I had know Bill since he was about 7 yrs old. His family and ours all lived in the same neighborhood. I felt so sad that the world lost such a good soul. I hadn’t seen Bill since his sister Terri’s wedding but he looked so good and so healthy. I have kept up with his life from his Mom Cass and his sisters Kit and Terry. They truly loved him and although he lived so far away they always talked to him as though he lived close by. Just reading these stories we can all think about the good time he had and the all the good friends he had. What a Guy!!! He left so many many stories. Good Bye Bill Please take care of your family they will need you to look after them. Keep the Saints in Heaven entertained I am sure they are all laughing hearing all your stories. Please Pray for all of us,
Love Aunt Joann
The very first time Mama met my mother – my “biological” mother – they started arguing over who had maternal rights to me, and that just because she “pushed me through her birth canal”, it didn’t mean that he loved me any less than if he had done it himself. My “birth mother” fell in love with him immediately – and finally “got” him, after me trying to explain him for so many years.
I still have one of his Stevie Nicks cd’s because he insisted on putting in some serious rehearsal time before we could go fairaoke Leather and Lace.
He was a super-human. Such a hilarious, sweet, generous, incredible soul.
I’m afraid I’m in the minority here.Billy and I were friends in high school. In fact, we were inseperable for four years. Fortunately for my husband (then boyfriend), he and Billy were friends too.
Though he was was not, physically, near me for years – he has always and will always own part of my heart. He and I had a long chat about that the day after the funeral. I got to go and spend some time alone with him.
Stories for the high school/Gino’s gang are many, so I’ll just relate a few.
While working at Gino’s (like a McDonald’s), our manager decided to have a pig roast. So, he stored this thing in our walk-in refrig. Well, one of our co-workers took it back to the employee bathroom. He propped it up, peeled the head covering down and put a cigarette in it’s mouth. He then sent Billy to clean the bathroom while everyone was out front. Next thing we know, we hear a high pitched scream and see this 6’4’’ body hurling itself over the counter and out the door. When he came back in, he was laughing as hard as everyone else.
Another time he and I went to see my boyfriend(husband) at a Boy Scout thing. Anyway, we got bored and went to the car to wait for Rich to meet us. We spent the time singing the songs of “West Side Story.” Billy was Rita Moreno. :)
I can’t fathom his not being here and flying in to see my daughter on Christmas day. I just take heart in the thought that he is with my mother (He called her The Champagne Lady), eating his maccaroni salad with 5 lbs. of pepper.
I love you William Thomas Charles Garrity. Someday (hopefully not too soon) the PVI gang will be together and you can snap your fingers and yell,”My group, my group.”
Thanks for listening.
Today was tear free, just remembering my friend while listening to sad songs.
To those of you who went to the funeral, I’m sure it was a painful experience, I’m jealous that you got to say goodbye in person.
I can only imagine what it was like.
John D. Genovese
http://towerblockmedia.com/public/bilgarrity/gsc.html
I am Sharon’s husband Rich and the last time I spent substantial time with Bil was in LA a couple years ago. Although he was thinner and older he was still the same guy that I met in 1980 at Paul VI. He still snorted when he laughed, did a rather good impression of Carol Channing, and kept his acting dreams alive between serving celebrities at Mortons.
Bill, I miss you. I miss your presence in the life of my family and in mine. Thank you for being a great friend.
Ah Bil…
We worked at Camp Ocky together in the mid 80’s—he was a counselor and I was a 15 year old CIT. My memories of Bil revolve around his penchant for dropping his colleagues with a finger-flick, his little white pickup regularly running out of gas after a Big Gulp/cigarrettes run, his criminally appalling observations in the communal showers. When I had to don a loincloth for a camp ceremony and couldn’t negotiate how a flap of leather and a piece of string became clothing, he gleefully foisted his aid upon me. In the interest of decorum, it was sorta like being diapered by a fellow adult. In the, gasp, 19 years of shame and degradation since then, that scene still makes me chuckle.
I’d hang out at the camp’s de facto seat of power, the Arts & Crafts building, with $Bil and Spiffy, the duo who dutifully and patiently served my life counselors, spiritual advisors, and nagging parents for that summer and for long thereafter.
Knowing my love for all music ‘metal’, Bil presented me with a worn-out white “DiscoTV” sweatshirt with the neck scooped out a la Flashdance. Bil was as oversized as his personality, and that thing positively draped over me. I wore so often in high school I had to routinely retrieve it from my mom’s trash. He made being a dork fashionable, which can be shocking news to an adolescent.
Honestly, at Ocky he helped a many a wounded teenager rise above with humor and love, plus a very healthy dose of disrespect. Whoever’s fitting him into his wings right now, watch out for the finger-flick.
Love you and miss you, Bil.
B-I-L
That was my cousin, the only person I knew who was addressed by spelling his name. Before everyone in our family started to pop out babies, he was the oldest cousin and I was the youngest. Dispite the age difference we have always been buds. Dollar Bil took care of me when I was a homesick kid at camp Ocky and would come by to say goodnight and make sure I was OK every night. He even managed to have me up dancing on a table at the coed dance. But we all know he had that power over people. He could make you so happy and comfortable in any situation, and he did it effortlessly.
This has been a tough week. It’s gonna take a long time for this hurt to go away, but when you start to think about Bil it’s really hard not to smile. Every memory I have is happy, funny, warm etc.
I miss you Bil
My cuz
My bud
My clown
My hero
like john above, i too am envious(in a way) that those who were able to go to bil’s funeral had the opportunity to see him one last time.
would that all that loved him (and there are so many) had the opportunity.
there are so many of us here on the other side of the country who will have to comfort ourselves with the many warm memories of a man who was larger than life. One of the most generous people many of us will ever meet.
I hope that his family can derive some comfort from the fact that Bil meant so much to so many people. That he belonged to (and was a cherished member of) so many “families”: through work, the theater, and his friends.
My warmest wishes go out to everyone that had the honor and privilege of knowing him. Another family of sorts – with Bil as its cherished center.
Billy
My Godson, my first nephew. We miss you dearly, you will always be with us. Give Mom Mom & Pop a big hug & kiss for me, I know they are thrilled to have you with them now!I heard so many funny stories this weekend, it made our heavy hearts a bit lighter. I thank all your friends for sharing their experiences with you. When Father Stan asked for someone to describe your humor, we had so many stories but we all froze in are seats,you was our Showman and we were lost without you. Thanks to your friend Daren for stepping up. Kit did a great job on her tribute to you, you would be so proud. You will be in our hearts always!
love ya, Ant Ree
Bil and I first met in highschool. We played the tuba together in the marching band. Two, chubby, out of place kids. What a sight that was.
A few years later, after high school, Bil and I would meet again in 1983 at Camp Ockanickon. For the next seven summers he and I would become dear friends, counseling children and teens. He was an amazing camp counselor. Together we ruled the roost as Spiffy Joe and Dollar Bil. Yep, those were our camp nicknames. To this day, children (now in their 20’s and some in their early 30’s) simply refer to us as “Spiffy and Dollar.” What fun we had.
Years later, we would both “retire” from camp and move on to other things in life. About two years ago, as I was sitting in my office at Barnard College in NYC, my assistant called me on the intercom, “Joe, there is this strange, flamboyant, colorfully dressed man who insists he MUST see you NOW.” Suddenly, and with out warning, Dollar Bil raced past my assistant, down the hallway yelling, “Spiffy Joe, it’s Dollar Bil, come out, come out wherever…..oh wait, you’re already OUT aren’t you?”
For the next two hours, Bil and I sat at a cafe on the upper west side, sharing lunch and many laughs. In fact, he had me laughing the entire time. Little did I know then, that day would be the last time I would ever see him. We spoke several times after that – every time, he made me laugh! But then again, that’s what Bil did, he made all of us laugh and brought us joy through that laughter.
He played many characters at camp. Sister Mirium Slinkums, Willie the Whale, and even created a game named after him…Dollar Daze. His greatest role was that of Chief Ockanickon.
So many wonderful memories, so much laughter, so many touched lives.
And so,
“The sun goes up and the sun goes down, the hands on the clock they move round and round. When it’s time to get up, when it’s time to get down, camp is great now…ain’t it?!”
Forever blue, we move you.
Farewell my friend, my blue feather chief of the Ockanickon nation.
Love,
Spiffy Joe
Merry Christmas, Mama. We all love you so much.
Last night a bunch of Bil’s old college friends got together to sing karaoke and drink and smoke and laugh, and remember Bil. We’d been planning to get together for over a month, but none of us could have expected we’d be together just a week or so earlier for Bil’s funeral.
Yet we made the best of the night, singing tunes in honor of our old friend, including one that was one of his signature songs (and NOT a Stevie Nicks one, unless she did a bootleg cover of it after a 48-hour hashish bender): These Boots are Made for Walkin’. Ever since I heard him sing it the first time, I’ve sung it in my head while slipping on a pair of boots. Every.Time.
How much more fun would it have been had Bil been there to sing with us? So much more.
His absence will be felt for years and years.
We miss you and love you, Bil.
I’m so sorry i couldn’t be there. i keep coming to this site compulsively, hoping there will be new posts, from people who knew Bil, maybe even people who knew him these last years at American Idol…
I felt so out of touch with his most recent life, with who he was spending time with and what he was up to these last 2 years, and I am missing him every day and hungry for new stories and anecdotes to fuel my obsession.
Dammit, I want him to be here, can’t believe he is not, want to rail against the passing of the light, or whatevr that quote is.
Mim, I know the poem you speak of.
It’s by Dylan Thomas, called “Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Night.”
I’ve found it to share with you all, seeing how appropriate it is for our friend….
Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Someone suggested to me the other day that maybe you were still finding your way in your “new place.” I assured them that you had probably already made yourself right at home.That you are probably already the life of the party.
Happy New Year my Gypsy Boy – I miss you more than I can say.
I visit this site on a daily basis hoping new messages are posted. There’s a sense of connection I feel to my brother when I read them. You are all such wonderful friends to him – in his life and in his death.
I sometimes think this all must be a mistake – I want him to come back so badly. I can’t believe he’s really gone.
I will continue to visit this site. Please keep posting your beautiful messages.
We will forward this e-mail address to Americal Idol. They are on hiatus until next week. Hopefully, they will then post some stories of his recent life.
I had a dream about Bil the night before last. He was hanging up flyers for some one-man show he was doing, he looked wonderful and full of energy, and we laughed to think that I had for some reason thought he was dead.
I agree with Ellen that wherever he is now, he has settled in, given everyone amusing nicknames, found the most comfortable toilet (hi, juzzy!), and become beloved by everyone in the place.
I miss him every day, and I will keep checking back here for new posts all the time. I’m sorry I wasn’t able to be there for kareoke mayhem.
Kathy, please tell your whole family I love them and am thinking of them all.
i,ll always remember bil, the very first time i ever met bil , was 33 yearsago, at our playground in green meadows in williamstown, in my underwear, even though i don,t remember, kathy still reminds me all time, and so did bil, bil took me to my junior prom, i had a ball with him, also fond memories on dancing on air also, always was happy go lucky guy, when i heard how sick bil was in december i couldn,t believe how sick he really was, and he was coming home for holidays, i couldn,t wait to see him, the unfortunate happened i saw him in a casket, my heart was broken to see a childhood friend dead, i was devistated, my heart is still broken i don,t think i will never get over it, well my friend, see you in heaven , be good, watch over your nieces and nephews, and your family, but most of all please watch over my son ron jr, we love you always , toni and ron marshall
another story about billy, we billy and his family lived in williamstown nj, years ago back in his childhood years, one day while sitting in thekitchen with sister Kathy and myself and of course, billy, he came up with this crazy idea, lets sing tommorow song, from the movie anne, but you had to do it his way or no way, so we did, his idea was to put the tape recorder in the middle of the kitchen floor and walking back and forth while singing it, well we all had to do it, needless to say it sounded horrible, and of course billy was in high scholl at the time and took the recorder on the bus so everyone in the neighborhood had to hear it,i was so embarrassed by it, he wasn,t , the neighborhood entertainer of greenmeadows, billy, i will never forget you, my heart is broken, and i don,t think i will get over it, i live day by day, looking at your photos,so i could proudly say , that your my friend,you,ll be sadly missed, please look over me, and my unborn son, ron jr,unfortunatly he,ll never get to meet you to see what a wonderful human being you were, love always toni rota-marshall
Bil certainly had a thing for that song “Tomorrow”, Toni. When we were in college, we were in Musical Theater class, and did some kind of show where we had to re-write and sing songs that were based on popular numbers (if I’m remembering correctly).
Bil’s song was “I’ll Borrow”—about wanting to take a cruise, and not having the money. “I’ll borrow, I’ll borrow, from mother, I’ll borrow, and then I will sail…….a……..way!!!”
He had us cracking up. Other friends may remember the words exactly, but in my recollection, he brought the house down with his rendition. ‘Natch.
The first time I saw Bil, he was on stage—playing Garfield! Needless to say, he was the best thing about that show.
I had a really nice Christmas with my family, but intermittently, I’d think about Bil and wish he was still in the world. Miriam showed me the little book of photos she put together—Bil covered in exploded broccoli milkshake a bad houseguest left in the fridge, wearing the hideous red wig as one of the Judds, posing with all of us housemates in the apartment on South St. Always that twinkle in his eye. He knew how to enjoy life. I don’t really think I believe in heaven, but I also don’t believe that that twinkle could just disappear.
Thanks for hosting these remembrances, Rob.
What can I say that has not already been said about Bil? I was fortunate enough to meet Bil in HS when he was “Billy”. He was the life of the party then but one thing in particular will always be Bil’s claim to fame in my eyes…..Bil was a regular on a local dance program called “Dancing on Air”. It was in the days of the Rock/Disco wars. Bil came to school one day proud as could be with his black, satin Dancing on Air jacket. He was so darn proud of that thing! I think he tried to wear it in school rather than the suit jacket that was required of the boys! When Bil and I would talk, that jacket always came up! The last time Bil and I got to talk on the phone he was up visiting and wanted to take me to a club. I so now wish I had gone! With three kids I just could not swing a late night and a long drive home to Delaware but had I known….. I always looked forward to our online meetings and Bil was the only one who could ever tell me “I gotta go poop, I’ll talk to you when I am done” I will miss Bil terribly and am still waiting for “JAKESUNK” to sign on. Just as we would end our online chats, I will end this….Kiss, kiss Bil. Love you lots.
R.I.P.
Your Brother!
Tommy,
A memory of you and Bil:
I remember being in your family room on Day Ave. just hanging out with your brother and Sharon one night. It was 1982, I think, and you were still little. Anyway, you ran into the room from the kithen in your pajamas with one hand held up in the air in a “this hand could belong to a monster” pose. You paused for a moment, then hollered “DA CRAW!” (The claw) and ran full steam at your big brother and hurled yourself at him, as if he were an evil alien. Unfortunately, Da Craw found its mark – Bil’s (and every other man’s) most delicate spot.
We had fun with “DA CRAW” ever since. Sharon and I laughed out loud when we remembered this.
Although at that moment Bil was in much pain, Tom – he loved you…. and always will.
I remember Bil when he was Billy. We grew up together, living next door to each other in Williamstown. Every summer we would spend the days putting on shows and daydreaming the time away. I would see him also when he went to visit his grandmother in South Philly since his grandmother and my grandmother lived next door to each other as well.
I have not seen nor spoken to Billy since high school.
I am very sad to learn he is no longer with us.
Been dreaming a lot lately about Bil… or sometimes he just has a cameo appearance in some dream about something completely random (write a bigger part for me, i can imagine him complaining!). About a week ago my dream was that we were in my car driving somewhere and talking about how he had been sick but was all better now, and we were just on our way to something completely mundane like a trip to get groceries.
It’s funny, we used to be so excited doing something as prosaic as going to National Liquidators in the village to buy a new mop or tea kettle… Both Bil and I shared the same weird gene that allowed us to stare for a half hour at a row of mops deciding which color handle we liked best.
I remember visiting Bil in Vegas in about 1997 and there was a huge thunderstorm and power was out all over town and he had driven me to a huge WalMart to buy a pair of sandals because my only shoes that I brought for the weekend had just fallen apart (broken sandal strap) and suddenly all the lights in the store went out and the cash registers didn’t work and Bil and I grabbed a pair of flip-flops and ran out the door. Yes, Bil Garrity helped me shoplift shoes in a thunderstorm in Las Vegas. That’s us, Bonnie and Clyde.
Outside, it was pouring-down rain but hot out, and we were soaking wet by the time we ran to his jeep, laughing hysterically at our 2.99 crime.
God, I miss him. Bil, I wish we could shoplift you a pair of cheap shoes next time.
The Los Angeles memorial for Bil will be held on February 5th (from 12 noon until 4pm)
It will be held at The Sacred Fools Theater (of which Bil was an important and pivotal early member)
The address is 660 North Heliotrope Drive. Los Angeles, California 90004.
The theater is listed on MapQuest (for those who would like to participate.)
Details are still being worked out but anyone who would like to help would be warmly appreciated.
I expect an overflowing crowd – with Bil being the center of attention (as always!). Only the center stage for our Bil.
(please feel free to e-mail me with any questions or suggestions)
Gerald McClanahan
We just wanted to let everyone know that the first American Idol show will be dedicated to Bil.
It is on January 18th at 8:00 p.m. on Fox.
Always Billy to me… I miss you! Thanks for taking care of Jeanie for us.
Love your cousin.
as i watched american idol tonight, laughing my ass off, when a african american guy, sung, “TOMMOROW”” i just had to laugh at him because that was billy,s favorite song, and all i thought about was him singing it, alot of laugher tonight at the rota residents, billy will always be our american idol, always wanting to be center of attention at all times, i want to thank american idol for the show in the memory of bil, we at home in nj, feel good about that, billy you will never be forgotten, we love you the rota, marshall, wagner, mc carthy families, xoxoxoxo
Well, I just watched Idol and Billy officially has made it! I always knew he was a star!! I’m just sad because now is the time that he and I would chat and he would tell me about all the contestants that he had the hots for!! Boy, I miss him!! Love ya Bil!
We wanted to thank everyone for their thoughts and prayers for our family. We were overwhelmed by the outpouring of love that was shown for Bil.
He was a very lucky man to have such great friends and family. He was a wonderful human being who touched everyone he met in one way or another. He was taken away from us far too early.
We cannot thank you all enough. Whether you sent a card, flowers, wrote a story on this website, prayed for us, or simply thought of us, we want each and every one of you to know how much we appreciate it.
Thank you again!!!!
FYI – The above message is from Bil’s entire family.
i’m so unhappy i didn’t know…i was home in nj at the time of his funeral…the cemetary is right behind my old house…i think this whole thing sucks…i keep searching for past discussions etc for a sign…he was so good..when he was small he was adorable…black curly hair…dimples…always smiling…he loved his family…in hs he was always joking…always…he loved women…he used to grab our boobs on the bus ride home… i guess he was trying to prove he wasn’t gay or maybe he just loved breasts….i remember all his crazy jobs…he was on a mission to constantly move around…when we all saw him at the hs reunion..the tenth one..he said he just had his heart broken by a sweet boy… his way of finally coming out to us all… i think we all knew but who really cared…i loved him..his hugs were huge…this sucks. kathleen
I can remember the rainy days at the shore and me and Bil would play boardwalk, miss ya.
Your Cousin Kate
I wanted to let everyone know that Bil’s mentioned in an article on Billboard.com.
If you go on the site and click on “Fourth ‘Idol’ premiere draws huge ratings” – there’s an article and it mentions the season’s dedication to Bil.
Also, if you go onto the American Idol site, there is a very nice paragraph written about him.
American Idol Season 4
Is Dedicated To
The Loving Memory of
WIL GARRITY
(1965-2004)
Wil Garrity was a production assistant and much-loved member of the American Idol family and was with us for Seasons 2, 3, and 4. His tireless enthusiasm and dedication to the show made him a popular colleague, but his openness and razor sharp sense of humor made him a true friend. Whether he was looking after the judges, supporting the producers, or taking care of the contestants, he threw himself into the job with a smile, even when he was feeling low. He worked to ensure that every contestant was well taken care of and arrived safely to the Hollywood auditions. He was meticulous with detail, down to the pink straw that Paula uses. Wil will be missed by all of us.
The above is from the American Idol Website
I knew Bil as a 6th grade teacher. I was the 7th grade teacher. Bil named me Roz the first time we met and never called me anything else. He was a terrific person and a great friend.
I only learned of his death after the funeral, and though its been a few years since I’ve seen him, just knowing that he’ll never stop by school again to say hello breaks my heart. I miss him. He was always the jokster,and always made the worst days so much better.
What I remember most about Bil were the crazy things he did. I don’t think a day went by that he didn’t spill his salad dressing on his tie, and spend most of his lunchtime trying to clean it off.
And then there was the time that he cut a bare spot in his sideburns, so everyday in school he used shoepolish to fill in the bare spot so that no one would notice it.
Bil, you lit up my life, and knowing you made me realize that the sun will come out tomorrow…I’m sure you’re doing a great act in heaven.
Roz
i just remembered something funny he did…it was in fifth grade and we all walked from the old school on library street to the church on carol ave…it was the wednesday before easter and our special treat was to watch old yellar in the basement of the church…i was bored and wanted to use the opportunity to screw around so i recruited billy to play a game of go to the bathroom with me…i got up first and went and when i came back-billy went…it went on and on until mrs. leach gave us the look from her seat in the front…billy started to watch the dumb movie and towards the end i could tell it wasn’t going good for old yellar…i began scanning the crowd for signs of weakness and when i looked at billy again his face was covered in tears…he saw me and gave me a pinch and said…shut up or i’ll kill you i swear to god…
Snowing like heck. I deceided to watch family videos. Dear God, there’s Billy at one of the many Christmas parties at my home. So dam handsome, so Billy! Everyone is so loud, so happy, so having a good time. What the hell happened? Miss you so much, still can’t quite deal with this. Love & miss you so much. Ant ree
Well here we go.Bil has been in my life for so many years. I was the lucky one who was given the title of Step-Mother.Although we never used the word step.He always made me feel so very special.Bil made me laugh and smile from the very first time I met him.The first time we met we spent the day on Wildwood boardwalk.Bil somehow got it in to his head that I had a knife in my bag and he was going to push me off one of the rides before I got to him and his sisters.After a while he decided I was ok.When Bil and the girls would come to Avalon for the summer with us he would direct and produce and I’m sorry star in a show he spent the night putting together with his sisters. Needless to say it was the best show we had ever seen. These shows went on for the summer and each one was better than the other.How I wish we could do it again. I have always felt so very lucky to have had the privelege to be a part of all of my childrens lives.He is so very much loved and missed by us all and will forever be in our hearts.I think the only thing that keeps me going is that he is in a much better place and that he is no longer sick. But than I start to cry and just want him back home with us. Love you forever,Shoe
I just wanted everyone who reads this to know I am putting together a memory book for Bil’s memorial service in Los Angeles Feb 5. Please email me (mim@zellnik.com) if you do NOT want something you wrote here to go in there, as I am planning to print out these blog entries as part of the book.
Also, email me if you have any other stories or thoughts you would like to share. I know that this cannot possibly be a comprehensive book about Bil’s whole life and all the many wonderful things he did and said, but at least it will be something tangible to read as we all remember him and miss him.
Bil with one L was one of my studetns at Camden County College. I just found out about his death and I can’t believe it. Bil tried many of the College’s major but finally found the Theatre Program and he said that this was the one. He graduated in 1988. While he was in the program he performed in our childern’s plays and main productions. He never lost a beat even when he had his jaw wired and couldn’t speak very well. He was a wonderful person and will be dearly missed.
I knew Bil and his sister’s Kit & Terri and his brother Tommy back when we were all kids growing up in Williamstown NJ.
When I got the phone call from one of our other childhood friends that Bil had passed away. I was in shock. I couldn’t believe it.
As I said,I knew Bil as a young boy it saddens me that I will never get to know Bil as the wonderful adult he had become. I wish things would have been different and that we could have all kept in closer touch.
When things like Bil’s passing happen it makes you realize just how short life can be. And it makes you wish you had told the special people in your life just how special they were and are to you,and how they touched your life in such a profound way enough though they never knew it.
My heart goes out as well as my thoughts and prayers to Bil’s family: Cass,Tom,Kit,Terri,Tommy and the rest of the family.
If tears could build a stairway, and memories a lane, I’d walk right up to heaven and bring Bil home again to you.
Also I wrote this poem for Bil.
You made us laugh.
You made us smile.
And all the while we did not know,
that one day soon you would have to go.
You were our strength.
You were our glue.
Without you what are we to do.
We know your safe in God’s arms, But that is little comfort when we want you in ours.
So when we look up into the night sky, we will see you in the stars.
So there we have said it and we hope know you know that you are loved more than you will ever know.
God Bless You Bil!
We will all love and miss.
Christine D’Ambrosio
I miss my friend and neighbor of 6+ years. I look forward to seeing many of you at the Celebration of Bil/Wil/Mama’s and so many other names he went by life at the Sacred Fool’s Theater on Feb 5.
I love my friend, I miss him, and I know he lives on inside each and every one of us.
Please let us know how the memorial is on the 5th. I’m sure all of us out here would love to meet all of you out there—a coming together of all who knew and loved Bil.
Wish I could be there to hear even more stories. Share some good ones with us.
i,m planning ono going to cemetery on 2/13/05 in morning to place flowers on bil,s grave site if anyone wants to join me, it,s valentine,s on 2-14 i want him to still know how much he is loved and missed,toni rota marshall
How did the memorial service go? Did a lot of people attend? I’d love it if someone would post here with any highlights or stories. I’m very sad i couldn’t be there.
The memorial went great. Thank you to Kelly and Gerald who included me in the planning of it. There was a great turn out and plenty of laughs and tears. The montage of photo’s at the begining was a make-up wreaker, the letter’s from family were inspirational and wonderful.
There was a point when we were yelling out Bilism’s. I am so hungry…..I could eat the crotch out of a low flying duck. I can’t because I have to be up at the crack of my crack. etc. It was fun and the room was howling.
People from AI came and spoke of how important Wil was to their production and how he will be missed.
YOU WILL BE ABLE TO SEE BIL ON “AI” ON BOTH TUESDAY AND WEDNESDAY OF THIS WEEK. Look for his bleach blonde hair running in and out of frame at the Paula, Simon, Randy table. Aparently both Paula and Randy hate coke and Bil would fill their cups with something… no one know’s what it is and were hoping it was something we would know. I think it’s diet coke and Red Bull.
Any how, I am still exhausted, it was a great celebration of his life. He will be missed for a very long time.
Thank you to all for thoughts, prayers, writings, pictures etc. We have some great stuff to send off to the family and show them how much Bil was loved.
It was a packed house. He was center stage. He was in his moment.
Deb
The hearty laugh, the head thrown back, the smokers cough and the phrase..”aaahh Gyps That’s Rich” is the way I want to remeber my friend Bil.
I was introduced to him via Ellen M and became friends, co-workers and The Judds.
We made the Associated Press with our reaction to Madonna’s Sex Book, something that Ellen had a hand in. After I purchased the book at Brentano’s she alerted the press and the photog came running after us. We were front page the next day…well some page at least!!
I rememeber when he broke his ankle here in NYC and I went to visit the next day in the hospital..Someone in a lab coat and clip board was at the foot of his bed..So Mark So and So…I responded his name is not Mark it’s Bil…do you live on 112th street apt 3d…..you don’t live on 112th street I say….the look coming from Bil’s eyes was If I wasn’t in this bed my broken ankle would be up your…..I was totally unaware what was going on but we did laugh about it for a long while after.
He loved a WIG and I being much slimmer then loved a dress. MOES, the bar we were working, was having a Halloween party and the staff was allowed, not required, to dress up. It took us 2 minutes and came up with the Judds.
He asked me what I would wear and I said something backless as I am tending bar and the reflection fron the mirror will showcase my back…I could not make his WIG big enough that night.. We were after all the darlings of Country music.. I used enough Aqua Net on his wig that night to start a fire. We were a hit that night and had a ball. When it came time to leave that night our boss, Bill, whom I nicknamed Mrs. Demars and was also known as Billdred offered us a ride home. I made a bee line for the front seat and Bil said where do you think your going. I replied “Up front were a Mother ought to be”oooh we laughed over that one for years…
I moved to LA for a year and the fun kept on going. “Gay Terrets” came from our riding around town in the open air and yelling vulgar things at the hotties we passed …You know what I want to do with the lube..
I introduced him to the phrase Mingya..Which he took and made his own. Whoa Whoa..Ming Toi…and he always broke up over my brother’s mother in law, Ebelyn Aballone who would tell you on a hot day she would powder her pussy. He actually called her one day from Mortan’s, when I stopped in for a visit, and asked her if it was true. She did not deny it and he was in heaven.
He called one night and asked if I would be home, I said yes and he said he was stopping by..It was an emergency. He came in with a wig. He was going to be in a show at The Sacred Fools and what could I do in a Nautical Theme.I managed that night to fluff into some sort of shape AND incorporate the plastic ship he had purchased on the way over.
He loved Polly’s Pie’s in Santa Monica. It was a diner basically but they had the best pie’s in LA. And they were SUGAH FREE…… He would call me sometimes to remind him that he was diabetic and that he couldn’t have SUGAH…he did this often as I did it in the voice of Bette Davis. Bil, I would say, you are a Diabetic and Sugar is not your friend.
Polly’s closed last year. I was lucky enough to have one last meal there but not with Bil with another friend, and although I had a good time it was not the same.
I lived in LA for one year and we did so much. Most of which I can speak of here but alot of that I will keep to myself.
I would travel back to LA often after I moved back east and we would always take up where we left off. After my last visit to LA I knew something was differant but could not do anything about it. I called still and sent Holiday cards but this past December my life as all of ours changed alittle bit.
A friend is gone and those lucky to have known him will have memories to recall however recent or remembered from long ago that will keep a smile on our face and each time we think of them our hearts will remember.
Bil has been on my mind lately and I was shocked to learn earlier today from a fellow NY Mortonite of his passing. For some reason, I was watching Idol the night his name appeared on the screen, I paused, and then thought it must be another Bil – like there could ever be another…
I recently emailed a very stodgy old aunt of mine in Sweden and was complaining about how cold it was here in NY. I just realized I used a Bil-ism: “It’s colder than a witch’s tit out here”. (I haven’t heard from her since…)
Bil, you were a light in the dark paneling of the “steak shack” (that was yours, too, I’m sure) and I only wish that we had stayed in touch after you left for L.A.
I’ve stolen from you, too, Bil – you’re just too irresistable. You see, my favorite friends always get a “Mommy loves you” when I say goodbye. Since there’s only ONE Mama, Mommy would have to do.
Mommy loves you, Bil.
Deb above summed up the memorial perfectly. Bil was the star – front and center.
It was a wonderful but gut-wrenching (yes, even a month and a half later) memorial and it was an honor to have been a part of this (with kelly and deb).
i think we did bil justice.
Just wanted to let you know that I have been visiting Billy frequently. His headstone is still not up, but I know where he is and he now has a few other “neighbors”.
Toni, if I can I will stop by on 2/14, but if not don’t worry – he’s never alone. He’s watching all of us from a far better place.
Sharon Cope Galassini
Don’t know if anyone watched “Medium” on Monday night(I’m newly addicted), but the guy who played Patricia Arquette’s brother on the show looked so much like Bil—his eyes, his cheeks, his goofy smile. And it being a show about a woman who sees the dead, well…
My goodness.
May God rest his soul.
Beloved friend,
Jeff Basiaga
Elen, IMDB says it’s some actor named Ryan Hurst… can’t say the photos remind me of Bil but maybe I had to see him in action to see the resemblence. Anyhow, here’s a photo… I think Bil would be pleased at your comments…
http://www.imdb.com/gallery/hh/0403652/ryanpaintjpeg.jpg
Just wanted to say, if people are still checking in here, I am still waiting to get the draft of the Memory Book back from LA, and will send people their copies as soon as i can. I have a list. If you wanted to be added, email me.
Thinking of all of you, and of course of Bil, and just wanted to say hi.
Bil and I met in 1983 when we were counselors together at Camp Ockanickon. We quickly became friends and kept in touch long after either of us worked there. I was a Village Chief which meant I supervised some counselors. Even though as a manager I was a work in progress, Bil was my greatest fan. When I was accused of “talking down” to counselors, Bil leapt to my defense saying, “Of course he talks to everyone like they’re eight year olds, he loves eight year olds!”
Bil and I were driving around the dirt roads of Camp Ockanickon one day in my 1966 Plymouth Fury held together by duct tape, rope and bumperstickers when Bil said, “Stop the car! That’s your shoe in the road up ahead.” I said that that was impossible and proceeded to argue with him. “John Mills, I’m certain, just stop the car,” he said. We got out to see and I had to admit it looked a bit like my shoe but I knew it couldn’t be, so I opened the trunk to prove my case. There in the trunk was one shoe sitting next to a big hole. Which only goes to show that as you drive through life you will eventually come upon your own shoe. And if you’re lucky enough to have Bil sitting next to you, you won’t run over it and keep going.
On December 1 of 1991 or 1992, if I remember right, Bil stepped off a curb in NYC and broke his ankle. As Bil told me shortly thereafter, he had had an insulin attack, lost consciousness and didn’t remember falling, just waking up in the hospital after not being hit by traffic. To cheer him up I sent him these four limericks:
A travelling friend moved at last
To New York where he got a part fast.
But the part was a boner
“And it hurt,” said the owner.
That was not the right way to get cast.
The part called for total collapse
With several mistakes and mishaps
Alas too well acted,
The ankle, he cracked it
And now hopes for trophies perhaps?
A friend who can act and can sing
And believes that the play is the thing
Just got his first break
But it was a mistake
And now his whole foot’s in a sling.
An actor whose ankle is lame
Tried to safeguard his fortune and fame.
For less costly cures he
Returned to New Jersey
And now plays The Pajama Home Game!
A few months later I got a limerick in the mail from Bil. Ocky is short for Camp Ockanickon. Knowing that I live in Ithaca, NY and that I’m a Quaker atheist, Bil wrote:
In Ithaca town there’s a Quaker
Who doesn’t believe in his maker.
His fag friend from Ocky
Can’t get any cocky
But he’s constantly looking for takers!
At Ockanickon one of Bil’s and my favorite things to do was to sing our kids to sleep at bedtime. We used to go into each other’s cabins and sing duets of Landslide and Leather & Lace. We also did a camp song, Little Drop of Dew, the two part harmony of which we could just about manage on a good night.
Years later whenever we got together we would sing those songs and many others. Some years on Bil’s birthday I would call him up and sing Stevie songs into his answering machine with no preamble. Bil and I also sang a dynamite version of The Seneca Village anthem to the tune of Oh Canada. Singing with Bil made me sound better.
I’m sorry it took me so long to write. I’m technologically challenged. I’m using a friend’s computer and it’s his email and website associated with my name. Thanks to Matt F. for calling me on New Year’s Day with the sad news. I tried to log in once before and couldn’t get through, no idea why. But I seem to have it figured out now. If anyone wants to reach me, the best way is to call information and say Ithaca, New York. I hope people are still checking this.
Bil always got a kick out of the thorough, sometimes maddeningly slow way in which I did things. So he would be the first one to forgive my being two and a half months behind. With infinite patience and a light heart he would say in a bemused tone what he said to me on almost every occasion when we were going to do something together and he ended up waiting for me, “John Mills! You’re just so deliberate!”
I visited Bil in Sea Isle a couple of summers. In 1993 or 1994 when he was pretty sure it was going to be his last summer there, and he was living in NYC, we had no idea when we would see each other again. So we made a failsafe plan. If we didn’t see each other before then, we were to meet at noon on 12/31/99 under the arch at Washington Square Park. I think we made that plan six years in advance and neither of us forgot it. We didn’t see each other in the meantime, so when I got his Christmas card in 1999, I called him up and said I wanted to keep the date but change the place. We met in South Jersey on 1/1/00 and had a great time together. I introduced him to an old friend of mine and they hit it off right away, and the three of us told stories and laughed for hours. Then, as we left my friend’s house, Bil and I sat in my car and sang for about an hour every song we both knew well enough to sing together. That was the last time I saw him, though we did connect on the phone once or twice on his birthday after that.
Dollar Bil, I mouse you! I mouse you very!
Whenever we were both in South Jersey, Bil and I would meet at the Medport Diner. I would bring cartoons, newspaper clippings, funny stories, etc. to show him. One evening we arrived there in separate cars, saw each other, but had to park pretty far away from each other as it happened. I was getting my stuff organized to show him, in my deliberate way, as he was parking. I took my usual long time but I still got into the restaurant ahead of him and settled into a booth. A few minutes later Bil came in flustered and exasperated. “John Mills!” he said. He always spoke my name as one word, JohnMills, and usually with an exclamation point. “Didn’t you see me waving madly to you?” “No, Bil, why? What happened?” Bil had been stopped in the parking lot by the police. He told them he was with a friend, me, and I had been so oblivious it looked to the police like I didn’t know him. The police thought Bil and I were involved in a drug deal. They were grilling him about me and he had to vouch for my character under great duress while I seemed to be either ignoring or avoiding them. And it took a very long time before Bil was able to make the policeman believe that his diabetes was the reason that his car was full of hypodermic needles.
We just wanted to let everyone know that Bil’s namesake was born on Friday, March 4, 2005. Terri had a baby boy – William Patrick Lindemuth. He weighs 7 lbs. 14 ozs. and is 20 inches long. Mommy and Billy are doing just fine!!!
JohnMills, Thank you for the great memories. Please keep them coming.
Bill’s Aunt Ree. Charlie Power’s mom, if you remenber him from Ocky.
Marie, I definitely remember Charlie! Awesome kid. Bil was so excited when Charlie was coming to camp. I forget if Bil asked me to be his counselor or if I snatched him up because he was Bil’s cousin. Both could have been true. Either way it was a coup for me, and all of camp too!
Here’s another Bil memory. Driving around in my car as we often did, I invariably had a bottle of Coke or RC Cola. I’ve never liked diet sodas. One day as I was opening a bottle I felt a pang of being a poor host doing that in front of Bil. As I began to offer him one I suddenly remembered his diabetes. So, without missing a beat, I changed what my sentence was going to be and said with a straight face, “Bil, would you like a bottle of insulin shock?”
Terri, congrats to you and the whole Garrity-Lindemuth clan! Welcome to the world, Billy Patrick!
Yes, congrats! I’m sure baby Billy will inherit Bil’s amazing sense of humor and infectious smile.
JohnMills, these stories are hilarious. It’s amazing that Bil was the very same way with everybody who knew him. And though he had millions of friends, he made each and every one of us feel like his favorite.
Congratulations Terry! Welcome baby Billy. The world is a great place and it was made even better by having had your uncle Billy in it!
congrats from L.A. to Bil’s namesake. as one light fades, another comes to life.
much love and blessings to the whole family
For a time at Camp Ockanickon it became a standing joke about Bil misplacing his car keys. Often he would ask fellow counselors if they’d seen them. He probably asked his campers too. So on at least one occasion one or more counselors, I never knew exactly who, took it upon themselves to “help Bil out” in the process of “finding” his keys. First they stole them and hid them. Then they left Bil notes. I remember once Bil telling me that he got a note saying his keys were at Old Senior Area. That meant Bil had to row across the lake to go and get them. But when he got there all he found was another note that sent him off to some other place. I don’t know how many stops Bil made on the treasure hunt for his keys but he checked back with me periodically to tell me he had at least one more place he was being sent. A part of him may have been a little frustrated by the ordeal but more of him thought it was funny. “JohnMills! You won’t believe what they’re doing to me!” he would say, almost laughing. I got the idea that he secretly preferred this game to his usual losing of keys. At least this way he knew somebody knew where they were. On subsequent occasions when his keys were missing he was genuinely disappointed if they hadn’t been taken as a practical joke. That meant he’d have to find them on his own, which was a bigger problem.
Once Bil came to me and said, “JohnMills! They’ve put a canoe in my cabin!” I went to look and there on the rafters, spanning the entire width of the cabin, was a 17’ aluminum camp canoe. It was in his bunk and the bunk bed across from his. I never saw a canoe look so big and it didn’t seem physically possible to wedge it in there, much less get it out. We couldn’t imagine how it had fit through the door. “How am I going to sleep?” he wondered. It must have been a staff cabin or maybe the day between camp sessions because I don’t think kids were staying in the cabin at the time. Bil had to sleep on a bottom bunk with a gigantic canoe hovering ominously over him all night.
Bil was so good natured that it was great fun watching him be the victim of some new practical joke. I had the best role of all, I got to laugh with him about them.
Camp Ockanickon has a tradition of giving out blue feathers to the best camper in each village each session in a very special and sacred ceremony the last night of the session. The campers’ names are then painted on wood carved Indian heads and the Indian heads are hung up in the dining hall. The Indian heads go back to the 1940s at least. The camp was founded in 1906. The Indian heads are taken down and put in storage over the winter. One summer Bil and I noticed on the first day that they had not been put back up. So we volunteered to do it but first we had to be told how by long time property director, Rick Hiles.
Rick Hiles knew every inch of the camp and had built or rebuilt most of it. He had a reputation for being gruff, even foreboding until you knew him. And he absolutely would not suffer fools or tolerate abuse of the camp grounds or property. In short, he was intimidating to most people. Bil and I went into the Warehouse, Rick’s shop and office, and asked if we could please have permission to put up the Indian heads and offered to do it ourselves. Think of me as the Scarecrow and Bil as the Cowardly Lion when they first appear before the Great and Powerful Oz and you get the picture.
Rick saw Bil visibly shaking and must have thought this was going to be fun. He explained how to hold the Indian heads to determine where to drill holes in the top of them so they would hang correctly and gave me the hooks. Then he proceeded to load up Bil’s arms with Indian heads. When Bil was holding about 40 of them they were very heavy and Bil was staggering. Then Rick laid the drill on top of the Indian heads and Bil struggled to keep from dropping them all. He hung onto the Indian heads but the drill slid off the pile and fell to the floor in more than one piece. Aghast and horrified, in what seemed to him to be a plea for his life, he stammered, “I’m very sorry, Mr. Hiles, that I broke your drill. I’ll pay for it.” Rick paused to milk the moment and then said in his deadpan Jersey Piney twang, “You didn’t break the drill. You broke the bit.”
Then Rick picked up the drill, put on a new bit, and handed it to me saying, “Maybe John can handle it.” Rick loves camp and camp traditions so he was probably touched that we cared enough to want to have the Indian heads put up. And I’m pretty sure he was close to laughing at Bil but he didn’t want to blow his cover as a scary guy.
For many years Bil told that story over and over. I think it was his all time favorite camp story. Imitating Rick’s twang he’d say, “You didn’t break the drill. You broke the bit.”
I’ve had such fun reliving memories of Bil, writing them down for everyone, and reading all the postings before mine. I’m going back to Ithaca tomorrow (where I still don’t have a computer) so it may be a while before I get to check in here again. But I will check in when I can. My love to all you FAROBs (friends and relatives of Bil).
John emailed to tell me he posted some stories, and he wanted me to post the story about me, Bil, and keys that I told him on the phone when we were talking a while ago.
OK, it’s a spring evening in glorious NJ, Bil and I have just finished placing all our worldly goods into a storage space because he was going to Sea Isle City for the summer and I was off to Alaska. He was driving out U-Haul, and I was sitting in the passenger seat with my feet up on the dash. We were both tired and sweaty from a long day of loading and unloading boxes and furniture.
As we pulled onto the highway to return the truck, Bil reached in his pocket and handed me the key to the storage space, sying “Whatever you do, don’t lose this key.” He placed it in my hand…
…where it went flying across my palm and out the window, to be lost forever on the side of the NJ Turnpike. We laughed and laughed, we couldn’t believe it. For some reason, it struck us as the most amusing thing in the world. Naturally, when the end of the summer came, we were able to get the storage space to cut off the lock.
John Mills has inspired me to tell a practica joke story about Bil.
We were in the same homeroom as freshman at Paul VI high school. Bil sat next to me. (Then he was Bill, Billy to the girls). For some reason he got mad at us (Dan Garofolo, Jack Franchi, me, and others) and stopped talking to us. I think we cracked some joke and even at 14, Bill was master of the dramatic reaction.
After a few days of being flagrantry ignored, we decided to up the ante. Dan and I turned his chair backwards. He’d have to react now we thought.
But, Bill walked into homeroom, paused for a moment, then sat down like everything was normal. The next day, we layed his chair down on its side - same thing. Our homeroom teacher, Mr. Tony Mitchell was pretty cool and never said a word about it. I don’t think it went on for more than a few days, but it was fun for all of us while it lasted.
I recall Dollar Bill singing songs such as “the weenie gal” at Ocky.
I have two memories of Dollar Bill which stick out in my mind the most.
One was when I was around 9 years old and very upset over who knows what one summer at Ocky. He sat with me in an area known as the bowl and heard me out for for every sobby thing I had to say. He recipricated some story that basically came down to “I am human too and I am your friend”. That day he had a “Tye-Dyed” TShirt on that had hundreds of little skeletons on it riding a roller coaster. I really thought he was AOK! That was probably around the summer of 1984. Throughout the years he was always a force behind any camp song.
In 1994 I went back as a counselor at Ocky and Dollar Bill came and visited and when I asked he what he was up to…He told he’d performed on Broadway. He had all the personality to so, that is for sure.
It seems like many people on this board had equally intimate encounters with this man who had a huge heart. As I have read the above I see that folks here call him $Bil. I never knew him through written correspondance, only verbal, so forgive spelled out term used.
John Mills was my Seneca village leader at age 7, who was also very vocal with hymns such as the “The Thresher”. I had no idea that Bill was also twilight vocalist to the campers, I mostly remember him for Dining Hall Hymns.
Allow me one more::
(picture Bill with one hand on his head and the other hand pushing his hip like a 1940’s cigarette girl)
singing —-
I am South Jersey Boy from my head to my hiney
Lord don’t you know I am South Jersey Boy!….
I hope you dear readers have enjoyed reading this as much as I have enjoyed sharing it with you.
Beloved friend,
Jeff Basiaga
Dear Gerald, Cara, and Leah:
We received a letter from the Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation International letting us know of your generous contribution in Bil’s name. We would like to thank you very much for your thoughtfulness.
We are hoping they will find a cure for this horrible disease so that no other family will have to endure the sadness that we are all still feeling.
Thanks again for your generosity and for being such good friends to Bil.
I just today learned of Bil’s death. What a sadness. I hadn’t seen Bil since college, but I have many fond memories of Bil. I can’t recall many of the details, but I remember a lot of laughter. Many long, hilarious nights spent with Bil, Rob, Tim, Dawn, Ellen, Kathy, Phil and Jeff working on G.I.G.
I’ll never forget Bil. He was one of those one-of-a-kind people that one seldom meets. How lucky we all were that we knew him.
I’ll leave you with one vivid memory of Bil:
Here he is playing Russ Stardust, lounge singer extraordinaire, dancing around blasting out his off-key rendition of “I Will Survive” during group therapy. He was simply hilarious on-stage and off. He could always make me laugh and for that I’m grateful.
Another detailed dream about Bil last night… it was really like we’d never been apart/moved from NYC. We were at some kind of party or event and there was this cute guy Bil wanted to flirt with and I and some other woman i don’t know (she knew the cute guy) were conspiring how to get them to sit next to each other at some cabaret thing that was happening. Bil and the guy ended up next to each other but then Bil’s cel rang and he proceeded to really rudely and loudly take a phone call, and i kept trying to shush him but he had an earpiece and kept turning his head away from me to continue to talk into the phone and i knew this cute guy was really hating bil (along with the rest of the crowd) for disrupting the cabaret show…
Finally Bil got off the phone and I whispered to him how loud he had been and he was mortified, and he got up and walked away, figuring he’d missed his chance with the cute guy, and then I woke up. Hmmm, Couldn’t tell you what it means.
I am Bil’s nephew and I wrote two things at school that I wanted to share with everyone.
Someone You Love
Did you ever have someone who you loved very much? I did. My Uncle Bil. He passed away on December 13, 2004. He was the funniest uncle anyone could ever have. He made you smile by telling jokes or making up dumb songs. He was very close to my heart, and I will always miss him! So you can see, I loved my Uncle very much.
My Magical Ride
Swish! Did your kite ever get blown away in the wind? Mine did down at the shore. The wind took it to heaven to see my Uncle Bil and the angels. The weather is very windy and dark. My uncle was with my kite, Dan, the whole time. He gave him a tour of heaven. My kite has red and blue stripes and all the sports on it.
Finally, the kite asked, “Will you go and see Jake? He really misses you.” So he did. My uncle looked a lot better and he wasn’t sick anymore like he was on earth. His life is really good in heaven. So you can see my kite had a real magical ride.
Those a great stories Jake!
I live across from Bil’s last apartment in Hollywood. I sure do miss him a lot lately, I think it’s sinking in. I hope to move soon. But I will always have the fondest memories of Hollywood and my neighbor Billy.
Jake,
I’m sure that you already know this, but it bears repeating. Uncle Bil loves you, too. When I knew Bil you were all he could talk about. You were his pride and joy, and I’m sure you still are.
I just heard about Bil’s death… I am literally stunned. He was one of the funniest and most courageous performers I ever met. He was, in the truest sense of the phrase, “bigger than life.” I, too, recall many long, hilarious nights with Bil and the gang working on G.I.G. in college.
My very best wishes to Bil’s family… And all those who mourn his loss.
Hey, Phil! How’s life post-dinner-theatre treating you? I keep checking back here, and I keep thinking about Bil all the time, and missing him madly. I’m glad to see people are still reading and posting here. Thanks again, Rob, for providing this blogspace for us all.
Hey Mim…
Yeah, since I heard about Bil I’ve been thinking a lot about my time at GSC and the whole dinner-theatre thing, too. I remember when Bil left the show and I had to take over as “the ship’s captain/country singer” - I always knew I would never be as fun as Bil was in that role; awfully big (clown) shows to fill :)
This blog really is great… It’s so good to see all of you still communicating after all these years. The pics from the Karaoke night made me quite wistful for old friends. Maybe the next time I get out east…
I meant “shoes” not shows…
Mim, no problem, it helps me and everyone else. Phil, a hearty hello to you and it’s good to hear from you. Now, if we can just find out where Charles Currier is…
Hey! I just sent email to an address I found for Charles and he wrote back! Hopefully he’ll post some remeniscences here.
Greetings all!
What a great site; I’ve been smiling continuously (and now painfully) since I started reading all of your memories.
I seem to recall Bil coming home with a copy of the erasure single ‘blue savanah’ and playing it constantly for at least two hours or maybe until I asked what the hell was going on.
I have an image in my mind of him standing in that crummy basement we were performing the mystery theatre in, and solving some logistical issue(which I, naturally, was taking way too seriously) simply by being silly, telling a joke or two, and generally creating comedy havoc to everyone’s pleasure. He could certainly handle a crowd.
I was fortunate to see Bil a couple of years ago by random encounter. The Sacred Fools clan had partnered with my company at the time (Pasadena Shakespeare) on a couple of productions, and ended up asking me to choreograph a fight for an upcoming show. I’m running in to my first rehearsal and nearly crash into Bil exiting. I think it had been 12 years and several states since our last meeting. He had me laughing about venue house in seconds. He was very reluctant to discuss his health; he just remarked about a couple of small medical issues and then we quicly jumped to howling about glassboro- he was a really sweet guy.
Great to hear a bit about all of your lives; I look forward to catching up with everyone.
Best Regards,
Charles Currier
Hi Charles…
Nice to hear from you. I hope all is well.
Charles! Phil! How I’ve wondered what ever became of you both.
I love reading these old stories of Bil from every facet of his life. He was exactly the same from opening night to closing night, in every sense of the word.
Just wanted to say hello, and glad that you’ve joined the conversation Rob started back in December. Karaoke was a fun night, and it’s great that those who weren’t there could share in the fun through the fabulous lens of Mr. Bosie.
—elle
Hey Ellen!
Karaoke did indeed look like a fun time. Like old times…
Best wishes!
Hey Phil- Glad they were able to track you down as well. This blog is really refreshing in a lot of ways-
Ellen! Great to be email chatting with you. I have oft wondered where you ended up; and then I saw you on some home improvement show (virtually the only programming I watch these days) and saw that you had a house and a signifigant other. You looked great and seemed happy… that was a real smile.
Rob Wigleslemeti- this site is wonderful- I’m in the middle of an 18 hour slog across country, but I’ll definitely be in touch when I’m back on west coast time.
Cheers All!
The power of these recollections is forcing light into little corners of my memory and our GSC lives with Bil.
I’m remembering that Goofy float we all made behind venue/avant house. We worked all night, thru rain and other impediments, even drying paint with spare par cans that either Rob or I had kicking around. I was fried by the next day when we lined up for the homecoming parade, and nobody felt comfortable driving the flatbed.
Bil shows up in full circus costume, complete with red nose and size 17 shoes, takes the wheel with an air of supreme confidence, and pilots us safely thru the whole thing, all the while shouting from the cab with mock outrage:
“HEY! WHAT KINDA CLOWN IS DRIVIN’ THIS TRUCK?!”
Perfect, Priceless; a laugh that lasts forever.
hahahha, that is great! i remember the remnants of that float sticking around for tattered-crepe-paper-YEARS after, but i never heard the story of its moment in the sun. Charles, I look forward to hearing from you, either here or in email, about what you’ve been up to recently!
Charles used the word “oft” in one of his e-mails
K
As you well know, I oft prefer to use words like oft.
For those that don’t know. Bil was burried in those size 17 clown shoes!
Hello,
Deb we appreciate you taking the time to go on the website to let people know about Billy, but unfortunately he wasn’t buried in the clown shoes. We are remined by him becasue they are sitting in Kathy’s family room and are obviously very hard to miss. lol………
For all of you out there who don’t know Bil’s 40th Birthday is this Thursday.
So, everyone, on Thursday, hell, I’ll just pick a time……2pm, Pacific time, stop whatever you are doing and think your finest memory of Bil.
KO
I think I’ll drink a Blue Whale in his memory. He loved drinking those suckers at Ellen’s apartment, playing with the plastic fruit basket(?) and holding court.
It’s been a while since I checked this…love the updates from everyone.
Can you share with the assembled: what’s in a blue whale?
(why do I feel like if I was sitting here with Bil we would be making disparaging comments about our weight and calling ourselves the real blue whales?)
INGREDIENTS:
* 1/2 oz. Blue curacao
* 1 oz. Rum
* Splash of Pineapple juice
PREPARATION:
Shake over ice. Strain into a chilled cocktail, or over fresh ice in a highball glass.
(the damned things looked like windshield washer fluid, and tasted horrible.)
Aunt Ree is having an Apple Martini in Bil’s memory. (Gotta tell ya that Blue Whale sounds horrid.) Here’s to Bil..XXXOOO.
Happy birthday, Bil, wherever you are. I biss you!
Happy Birthday Billy! I’m sure you are hosting quite a party!!!!
Just felt like posting here. Was very briefly in NYC this past weekend, seeing my brothers’ show Yank, and was of course reminded of Bil and thought how much he would have loved to see it. I think about him often, and every so often check back ehre to see if anyone has posted anything new. So, if anyone ehre is still reading: hi!
There was an American Idol cattle call the other day in Chicago.
I think Bil would’ve been here for that and we wouldn’t gone out on the town afterward.
Instead, I went down there to the auditions and picked up a 12 year old boy in parachute pants, who sang some Lipps, Inc.
Bil would’ve wanted it that way.
Hahahhaa, that’s priceless, KathyO!
My Mistake Jake. When I was in Bil’s apartment with his folks, his mom mentioned that’s what she was going to do. I am actually glad, that they are in Kathy’s living room as a keen reminder to enjoy every day and to remember to find the funny in everything as Bil did.
Chiming in a little late, but KathyO, I thought you never went for boys under 14. You’re getting salacious in your old age.
L’Shana Tovah to the Jews out there.
Which reminds me of Bil’s rap for me (I’ll repeat it again, as it is seasonally appropriate) when we were in GIG:
I’m the Rosh Hashana mama, gonna rock these walls.
Give you gefilte fish and matzoh balls.
Kick it out, oy vey!
Just popping in to say a bunch of us watched the Philly-in-early-90s video this past weekend because a friend from then was visiting, and the few scenes where Bil appears made me laugh and get teary-eyed and it reminded me so much of his voice and sense of humor and wonderfulness (also reminded me what i looked like when I was YOUNG, my god was that really 15 yrs ago, but that’s another story). B-I-L, I am still and always will be remembering you and missing you. Oh, and if anyone here is even still reading, just for the record i am very pregnant and growing every day… A baby boy is due in Feb, how I wish Bil were around to be a doting “uncle” to my kid-to-be!
Hi Everyone! Cannot believe it is almost a year since Bil has passed (December 13). Reliving many very hard memories from last year.
Though many wonderful things have happened, they seem to make our family miss him even more. Happy to see his dear friends are still thinking of him! Hope everyone is doing well!!
One week until it’s been a year since Bil left us.
I can’t believe it.
Mim, on a happy note, so glad you are well and helping put more wonderful people on this earth.
Happy holidays, all. And to you, Bil.
A moment of silence please, for Bil. It’s a year today.
I went to see Billy yesterday (12/13).[I do that quite a bit, but was especially compelled yesterday.] It was nice to see that his plot had a blanket, a small silver Christmas tree and a Santa boot. It made me smile.
I still expect to him knock on my door this Christmas. It is so hard to fathom him not here. I sill think he is in CA and we just haven’t caught up.
To Cass, Tom, Kathy, Terri and Tommy, please know you are in the thoughts and prayers of my family and I. Have a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.
To Billy, well you know I’m the crazy lady who comes to talk to you in the cemetary. I love you and miss you very much. You will always have a piece of my heart.
Love Shyna(AKA Shar Cope Galassini)
Bill, thinking of you at Christmas time. Everyone misses you- did you know how much we all loved you? I hope so. Merry Christmas.
Bill, thinking of you at Christmas time. Everyone misses you- did you know how much we all loved you? I hope so. Merry Christmas.
Merry Christmas Billy! Miss you tons!
Thinking of you from here, Bil… and wishing a peaceful 2006 to all who loved you.
Sharon, Elisabeth, and i were talking about you today Bill over lunch. Dont worry - it was all good. :-)
Elisabeth (now 12) remembers your Christmas visits fondly. I am sure your ears were burning.
Several of us at work today were discussing our college lives and the people we remember from “academia”. I spouted off what few stories I could of people and events that I could remember when I realized I had done a good 15 minutes on Bil. I killed.
Thanks Bil.
Hey Bill,
I went to see PVI’s production of West Side Story this year. Sharon and I wound up chatting about the two of you singing all of the songs together while driving home from school, or going out for coffee.
We miss you.
Was just thinking about Bil today.
That’s all.
I sure do miss Bil
Well Billy - your birthday is almost here. Hard to believe you’d be 41. I miss you terribly, but you know that since I talk to you when I visit Gate of Heaven.
Have a great party in Heaven and invite Mom.
Love you always, Shyna
Been thinking about you a lot Billy. It might be because I got my two reminders that your birthday that is coming up. I refuse to take you off of the list. When I see your name in the subject area, it’s like I am getting one of your crazy emails again! Boy, what I wouldn’t give for one of those or one of our priceless IM conversations.
I’ll be flying on your birthday to start our next family vacation of the summer so could you take extra care of my plane???
Love and miss you lots Bilba!!
In honor of Bil’s birthday here’s one of his favorite limericks of mine:
She who’s my maternal anterior
Is pleased when my grammar’s superior.
So well tuned is she
That (between you and me)
Correctly fouled verse makes her more cheery.
And since I can’t sing to his answering machine or voicemail, here’s a song that we sung together in two part harmony:
Little drop of dew of dew
Like a gem you are
I believe that you must have been a star
When the day is light is light
On the grass you lie
Tell me now at night are you in the sky?
Little drop of dew of dew
Like a gem you are
Shining bright like diamonds,
Senecas we’re one
lovingly borrowed from the Rangerettes
Happy Birthday Bil!
Well Billy,
I feel like I’m nuts when I say things like this, but you know Rich and I came to see you on your birthday. I understand that Gate of Heaven is more a place for those of us left behind, but I honestly believe you know when I visit.
We miss you terribly. I was going to bring you some “crookeds”, but didn’t think the groundkeepers would appreciate it. ;)
Love you lots, Shyna
For some reason, had the urge to pop in here… thinking of Bil a lot lately and not sure why, other than the obvious that I miss him. I wish he could have seen and met Theo, who is now 6 months old and a smiley wacky baby!
You hear so many scary things these days about your personal information being posted on the internet that I decided to run a Google search on my name to see what would happen.
What I found was a this forum and a note from Ellen Winkler Buchsbaum back in December of 2004 talking about rubbed her breasts and me spreading rumors by recording it in the Venue log (LOL). I’m pretty sure Bill would have found some humor it that.
I lived with Bil, Barry, Dave and Max at Glassboro in 1990. I had transferred to Glassboro in 89’ without a clue about being part of a magazine. As I wandered into the Student Center I remember seeing a Venue Magazine – that was it – I was hooked. Bil and everyone welcomed me into the Venue family (despite the fact that I couldn’t spell worth a damn). I think what I will always remember most about Bill was how effortlessly he would draw for Venue. Hanging out with Barry, Dave, Bil, Dawn, Kathy, Rob, Lauren, Ellen, Jeff, Jim - good times. Remember those insane bunk beds that we built in our rooms? I still have my lava lamp.
You know, I’m not sure how or why people fall out of touch with one another … moments like this make me sorry that I never made more of an effort to keep in touch. I still have my Venue (best in toilet literature) t-shirt. It reminds me of friendship, creativity, parties at D-106 and of course … of Bil.
Um, yeah. I am sure Bill Thomas is sufficiently freaked out right now. But, very much alive.
Can you die from embarrassment?
Because I think I just did.
Anyone know a good cardiologist?
OK – well feel free to delete my previous note … Sorry to drop in unannounced.
Hey JohnMills,
Wow. Great posts. I’m glad I looked in here for the first time in two years. That drill bit story made me laugh out loud. I don’t think I’d ever seen $Bil flustered. I was always his flusteree….
That car you had should really be enshrined somewhere on Ocky grounds. Preferrably under water.
Anyway, thanks.
Hey Dollar!
Two years today. Miss you, Bil.
Missing my old friend, roommmate, pal, today as always.
Scott Gordon, thanks for that!
I tried to check in last month but the site seemed to be down. It’s OK now.
That old car, the ‘66 Plymouth Fury, Betsy, died suddenly when I was on my way to see Bil and Chris Wells at the Marlton 8. We were going to see White Men Can’t Jump on 4/16/92.
I had a head on collision at Greentree Road and Rt. 73 (my fault trying to turn left where I shouldn’t have) and that car gave its life to save mine. There was no damage behind the windshield, no glass broke, not even a light, but the engine was all caved in. The station wagon that hit me also died but its driver got only a concussion. I got two chipped teeth, since the car didn’t have shoulder belts.
The police kept me at the scene a long time, only a few hundred yards from where Bil and Chris were waiting for me, trying to talk me into going to the hospital. I refused and kept asking them to drive me across the parking lot so I could meet my friends and tell them what happened.
They finally did and Bil and Chris talked me into going to the hospital, where Bil waited with me for 4 hours until a doctor saw me and told me to see a dentist. Then he made me sign a piece of paper saying he had told me to see a dentist. Bil waited patiently through all of that and then took me home. Because Bil was with me, it hadn’t seemed like a long wait to me. I kept laughing at his exasperation that they were making me wait, and we joked about what it would have taken to be seen. They didn’t appear especially busy or overwhelmed.
Two weeks later I got a green 1980 Oldsmobile with 99,500 miles on it, Big Greenie. 14 years and 8 months later, on 12/9/06, I finally had to part with Big Greenie. Too much rust to fix, so I drove it 100 miles to a junkyard for its final trip and said goodbye. They gave me $100 for it, much more than I expected. It had 246,931.5 miles on it and its engine was still great!
Bil knew that car and would have appreciated our loyalty to each other, as he did with the Plymouth and me.
We went to Paul VI as a family to check it out for our daughter (She is an 8th grader!).
Saw people that were only just hearing about Bil from us for the first time. Sandy Clarke didn’t take it well (she was there with HER daughter). Although she lost touch with him a few years back, they were buddies.
Also, the PVI alumni magazine put him in the class of 1973!! (I will do something about that)
Oh my god, he would HATE that! Jesus,that’s OLD!
Bil was in a dream I had this week. Still in my heart, he is.
Went to visit Billy the other day. I’ve been thinking about our many times together, a lot lately.
Maybe it’s the fact the Elisabeth is going to be attending PVI next year and we’ve had to go up to school quite a few times. I still feel like it should be us walking those halls. I still can feel you sitting next to me , in the auditorium, watching Gina and Rich in “West Side Story”. I miss you soo much. I’ll always love you William Charles Thomas Garrity!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
My Mom died on May 23 of pneumonia and congestive heart failure. I was with her and it was sad but she had been suffering. She was 78. I’m doing OK. I stayed at her house in Maryland taking care of things. I brought her cat back to Ithaca with me on June 2nd.
I write that here because I hadn’t been able to cry much until June 10th when I was watching a Cold Case rerun on CBS. I’d seen that episode before so wasn’t paying a lot of attention because I knew the story. What I hadn’t remembered was the ending, where the music is Stevie Nicks’ version of Landslide. Not the Dixie Chicks version which is also good, but the Stevie version which is hauntingly beautiful. And they played the whole thing. Bil and I used to sing that song together both to our summer camp kids and just to ourselves.
So I turned up the volume, closed my eyes ignoring the episode’s video and sang along. At the end I suddenly had a thought that that was Bil’s way of telling me that he was with my mom and she was all right and he was taking really good care of her and telling her stories about me. So I began to cry as I thanked Bil for being there for my mom.
Of course I don’t really know. And I neither believe in nor dismiss those possibilities. But one thing I do know. If Bil could have he would have. That would be just like him.
Happy belated birthday to Bil, wherever he may be. Miss him always. July 21 will forever be his day in my heart.
Belated Happy Birthday, Billy!!!!!!!!!!! I wished you this on the 21st, but wanted to have it written somewhere since I can’t send you a card.
Funny. I was googling something completely unrelated and, lo and behold, this was the fourth link down. I knew that the URL was familiar.
Bil, working in mysterious ways?
I’m glad. Gave me a chance to catch up on some of the more recent posts.
Mills, first you made me laugh about the drill bit, then sad about your mom. Then I though of him waving wildly from a cloud, lopsided curls bouncing, wearing a ratty white sweatshirt and hollering “HIII!” at full volume, with her beaming in the crook of his big arm. She’s waving too. He’s almost loud enough to hear him. Good stuff.
Peace.
Thanks Scott! That image of Bil makes me laugh too. I’ve been thinking about him a lot lately as the sad anniversary passed.
Well Billy, it’s the 25th year of our high school graduation. So many memories keep enveloping me. The poconos, Disney, singing the West Side Story soundtrack while waiting for Rich at Pine Hill, crookeds, Dancing on Air. The list could go on and on. What I remember most is how big and comforting your hugs could feel and how beautiful your smile was ,especially when accompanied by your snorty laugh. As always I hope your family is well and I hope you and Mommy are looking done on us and putting in a good word.
Much love, Shar
jeff b. sends john mills hug mail after hearing of his mother
Thanks Jeff! Hug mail to you too.
Dear Kathy, Teri, and Tommy,
Hope all of you are doing well and still checking in on this site. Your brother will not be forgotten. He is loved too much.
Rich said he ran into Cass not too long ago. I hope she is well.
Anyway, I just wanted to let you know our family thinks of all of you. I think of Billy often, especially since Elisabeth is a Freshman at PVI and I’m there quite a lot. It’s strange how long forgotten memories and feelings can be brought back so vividly by the smallest of things. Elisabeth was in the play and when I was in the Auditorium things that had long since been forgotten (you know - little everyday things) just popped up and I looked down the aisle half expecting Billy to be waving to me to get my seat with the rest of the old gang. Be well.
Shar
It’s been 3 1/2 years (approximately) and I find myself still thinking about Bil - his warmth and his heart.
I’m a writer out here on the West Coast and last year I wrote (with another friend of Bil’s) a TV pilot about a gay retirement community.
We modeled the lead character after (and named him) Bil - with one L. Of course the character could never do justice to his real-life namesake, but we had a blast injecting Bil’s zest and humor into this character.
He will always be remembered, he will always be loved, he will always be missed.
We were all so very blessed.
Much love and best wishes to Bil’s family - both immediate and extended.
G.M.
Thanks for the update, Gerald. I too think of Bil all the time… I have two kids now, and I wish like hell they could meet him — I know he would have been such a great doting friend-uncle! I would love to know if your pilot ever gets picked up, or can be seen somewhere! Hell, I’d love to read it, if you were willing to share the script with a reader! (mim@well.com)
Dollar Bil, Camp Ockanickon and all of it’s campers you’ve touched will never forget you. Rico Beetle
Hello to all,
Just wanted to update Bil’s friends with how our family is doing. We are all still missing him very badly - glad to see his dear friends are still thinking of him as well. Although we knew he was special, it helps to know that he is not forgotten. We are all doing as well as can be expected but we believe Bil is with us all the time so that helps. Hope you are all doing well. Congrats Mim on the second baby. Gerald, please let us know if the pilot takes off so that we may see it. Thanks!! Bil’s Family
Gary Walton wrote in the Camp Ockanickon alumni blog about Bil and Rick Worrell then asked Gary how Dollar Bil got his name. My response to Rick is also the story of how I met Bil.
While the best and most accurate answer would be from
Dollar himself, and Gary may know more than I, here’s
what I remember. It was staff orientation 1983 and a
bunch of new counselors and I (in my 4th year) were
sharing my cabin. That was the first time I met Gary
Walton, Dollar Bil, Ted Ted the Ranger Head, and
another counselor named Ted Shipon. Dollar Bil may
have just said, “Just call me Dollar Bil.” I think he
gave himself the name and it didn’t come from us.
I remember he was the most politically conservative of
us, anti-choice at the time, and that I thought I
might not like this guy if he’s got a lot of right
wing views. I thought Gary was the coolest of the
bunch. (Except for Dollar he was.)
But that all melted away in that first week as Bil was
interesting and funny and I realized quickly there was
a lot more to him than off-hand remarks. And those got
funnier and funnier the longer I knew him. In the
fourth session of that year he came to work with me in
Seneca (youngest group, 8 and 9 year olds) and was immediately my best counselor. And we were friends forever.
For the record Bil was pro-choice all but at the
beginning and conservative about nothing else I knew
of. Though if he had espoused capitalism in the first
week that could have been where “Dollar” came from.
But I don’t remember him doing that. Bil was
definitely the oddest ball of that orientation group
and the most fun.
Happy Birthday, Bil Garrity… I will always be thinking of you every July 21 til the end of time, and wishing like mad I could call you up and say Happy Birthday on the phone to you (or more likely leave 10 voicemail messages because you’re too busy to answer your phone!)
Belated Happy Birthday Billy. I stopped by the cemetary on your birthday and saw that there is a nice little flower garden now.
I miss you terribly. Elisabeth has been bitten by the acting bug. She wants to do stage work. I wish you were around to fill her in on how this business really works. I don’t want to take away her dreams, but it scares the heck out of me.
I will always remember how determied you were to get into the business, starting with “Dancing on Air”. You made sure you did it. Watch over her Billy - please. Love you always.
Shar
Just thinking of Bil today as I was at target and saw some stickers and mouse pads with the “Little Miss Trouble” et al childrens book characters in the dollar bins… For some reason, I recall Bil and Val and each assigned ourselves one of these characters, although all I recall is that Val was Little Miss Trouble.
Also, i find myself thinking how Bil would have fucking adored facebook and sites like that, and would have had the best twitter updates etc.
Today is not one of my better days. I’m missing my mother terribly and I’m missing Billy. Lately I just want to feel one of his big bear hugs that would make me feel better when I was down.
Maybe it’s just because school has started again and my mind flashes back to being at PVI. Also, our Reunion is Nov. 1st and it is just not fathomable to me that he won’t be there to dish on our classmates.
I have been thinking of Bil a lot lately. I think he has been visiting me at night and violating my boyfriend.
Miss Bil today.
Funny, I was alomost gonna post here today… been missing him something awful lately.
I went to visit Billy on the 14th. I still can’t believe he’s not here, let alone that it’s been 4 years. There’s a nice wreath by his stone and I tried to clean off some leaves and junk.
I miss him terribly!
I thought of Bil this week as I led a Presidential Puzzle Hunt with a mixed age group of kids from kindergarten through fifth grade. I gave six teams a list of ten questions about Presidential history. They had to find the answers which I had hidden in the school. Then they had to assemble the answers in the right order and that would spell out the name of another President. The winning team was the first one to do all that and then answer all the questions correctly without looking at the answers. We did this during the week of winter break when we run our after school program in the school for the whole day.
Bil used to do these elaborate games for kids at Camp Ockanickon and they were always so much fun for kids and counselors alike. He had everyone bowing to him as the master of the game. Each game had a million little creative twists and it all fit together so beautifully. I don’t remember the details but one was called Dollar Daze. I had a ringside seat “helping” Bil but really just sitting by his side watching him orchestrate and choreograph the madness and happy chaos. His energy and good natured enthusiasm was infectious. He kept everyone laughing so no one minded his benevolent monarchy.
I really felt like I was channeling him when I ran my game this week and the kids loved it.
Wow. I just learned of Bil’s passing today. I’m truly sad to hear it. The last time I saw Bil was at the Haddonfield Patco station over 10 yrs. ago. I needed to call a cab, and he suggested one. Not only was Bil funny, but useful too. I know he is sorely missed by all that knew him. There is no other like Bil. A true original and a frggin’ riot.
One of my friends Pam Schecter was talking about CIT’s and good memories when we all went to camp in Medford, NJ. I said how he was my favorite and then she told me of his passing. Even though he was older than me by quite a few years,Dollar Bil was my FAVORITE, so funny and just an awesome man. I will truely miss him, but knowing him he would always want him to laugh and celebrate his life. As sad as I was to hear this when it is now 2009, I know so many people loved him and glad to see all the great memories you had w/ him. LOVE YA ALWAYS !!
Thanks Cheryl! Dollar Bil was my favorite too. And Pam Schechter is my friend also. Have you seen the Ocky Alumni website?
I like to pop in just to see if the site has been updated. The fact that there are still new posts is a testament to Billy and the impact he made on so many lives. When he was here, with us, I don’t think even he could have imagined he touched so many lives and is loved so dearly!
I’m subscribed to the RSS feed so I always see new comments here. I miss Bil so much sometimes, and constantly remember amusing things we shared. He really was an amazing guy, and is alive in so many people’s memories.
Just thinking about Bil a lot lately, not sure why. I can hear his voice in my head to this day.
Billy has been in my thoughts a lot. The fact that his birthday is only 13 days away only enhances that fact. Also, I recently had to tell an old classmate that Billy had passed away. Kath, if you’re reading this, it was Gina DeLeo.
I’ve been missing my Mom a lot as well, so hopefully that just means that they are together and having a good laugh. You know- one of Billy’s snorty laughs. The one that couldn’t help but make me laugh with him.
Happy Birthday, Bil Garrity! Miss you! Love you!
Yes, those laughs always made me laugh too. I think the funniest part was that Bil was always surprised when he snorted, as if it had never happened before even though it happened every time!
I am missing Bil a lot today.
Cannot believe it was five years ago today - still so friggin sad!!
Missing you and always will, B-I-L.
Where does time go? Kath, I’m so sorry. There are times I still think Billy is in CA, but then I go to visit his grave and just sit there and talk to him, laugh about something we did together or cry. He’ll always be alive in my heart and will always own a piece of it.
Funny. I was talking to a early 30ish guy named Joel in my Brooklyn apt building a couple weeks ago. His name is Joel and he mentioned that he lived in southern NJ for a bit. I said, Oh, I went to a place called Ocky for a couple years, and, lo and behold, he was a campter there (though long after my time.)
Today, I got into a conversation with a fellow cyclist named Audra who, whaddayaknow, attended Ocky in the mid 80s. Her mom was the nurse, Carol.
I started getting all nostalgic, and then I knew I had to stop by here, catch up, and leave a virtual stone on $Bil’s headstone.
Still love you and miss you buddy!
Sharon, I haven’t gone through all of the postings and I don’t know you IRL, but I’m sorry for the hurt and the loneliness you’re feeling. In addition to reminiscing about Bil’s snorty laugh I’m sending a virtual hug your way.
Happy Holidays all.
Scott, Joel doesn’t have a twin named Jason, does he? At Ocky we had twin boys, Jason and Joel, who were nocturnal screamers. Identical twins, in their sleep, one would start letting out blood curdling screams. This would go on for several minutes. And then, from a cabin at the opposite end of the village, the other one would do it too. We would wake them up, they’d be fine, have no memory of it, no bad dreams to report. When they were awake they were both great kids, smart, happy, well adjusted. And then the next night we would wait. And it would start all over again. First one and then the other. We moved them as far away from each other as we could but it didn’t matter. In their sleep they could hear each other and as soon as one went off, the other would too. This went on for several years of their camp life. Eventually we got to the point where we wouldn’t wake them up and just let them scream, just to scare the counselors who hadn’t experienced them. Amazingly, none of the other kids ever woke up, camp having exhausted them so.
Bil was a counselor with me their first year. And the next year when they advanced in age group, Bil had become the village chief for their group and got them again. All the counselors were freaked out by it but none more than Bil. Bil’s reactions were so funny, both anticipating and then responding to the inevitable. When we saw their names come up on the camp rolls for returning to camp in following years, Bil must have said, “Oh no, the screamers!” And then he loved telling the story to the new set of counselors who were going to get them.
I channeled Bil again on Friday, doing another Puzzle Hunt with kids, this one about raptors and other animals. We’d had a group of raptors visit the kids the Monday before. I sent kids off in all directions of our school looking for clues I’d hidden. They had to find the clues, solve them, in some cases googling answers, and then assemble the clues to spell out the final answer. Happy mayhem worthy of Bil!
John Mills - today $Bil popped into my mind. I recently finished my stint on the board and was reflecting on all the Camp years. As such, I went back and read ALL your posts about Bil. I had forgotten so many of the things you mentioned, until I read your posts - “the screamers” - yes, I rember, singing the children to sleep, the hunt for his keys, Dollar Daze. I even recall his wanting us to make plaster penis molds when we were in AC (which I quickly over-ruled). Wonderful memories of a wonderful man. Thank you for remembering my friend….I will never forget Bil and the laughter he brought to my life.
I visit this site when I can and am so happy that after so many years Billy is alive and well in our hearts and thoughts. I think of him often , as I have posted. What I have thought of lately is that his 45th birthday is a little over a month away and how he would have HATED it. LOL Oh Billy, even Stevie Nicks acknowledeges her age. it is only a number. :) All the best to those who love him. He will forever own a piece of my heart!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Spiffy Joe - thank you for writing that and for going back and reading all my posts! I had such a good time writing them, laughing probably more than anyone who reads them. I got a new laugh when I read your plaster penis memory! I think there could be the makings of a song there. Thank you for being his friend, and for being mine!
Sharon - I think about and celebrate Bil’s birthday too. And I think of him every time I hear Stevie. I used to call his answering machine on his birthday and sing Stevie songs for him. And thinking of him makes me love her more, just as he would.
Can’t believe Billy’s 45th birthday is past. I would say belated but I went to the cemetary on his birthday. Billy, I was going to leave some “Crookeds” but figured the insane squirrels would get them. LOL
When I think of us being 45 I can’t believe it. I know Billy would be so totally freaked. He would be telling people he was in his early 30’s - maybe.
Seriously, I miss seeing your face, hearing you laugh and having you answer me when we talk. Love you Billy. Love to the Garrity family.
Sharon Cope Galassini
YES. Confirmed. Joel was one of the Screaming Twins. Amazing how Ocky always keeps at least a finger tip of reach on you. Wild stuff.
I was working on some writing over the weekend and was thinking of colorful characters to throw into the mix. $Bil came to mind. His role is a combination of patience, guidance, and flicking me in the cubes while giggling.
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