Coming up next, on American Dressmaker: Brenda’s about halfway done with the wedding dress mockup, but Rob’s sister Christina and her future sister-in-law Monique are coming over tomorrow to shop for fabric in the city, for THE REAL DEAL. Meanwhile, Rob proposes eating leftovers so he can drink beer and contemplate installing the latest version of Textpattern on his laptop, which just might push Brenda TO THE BRINK! Will she fold under the pressure? Find out next, on AMERICAN DRESSMAKER…

Whoa. Did I just encapsulate our evening as though it were a teaser for one of those grease-monkey reality shows? Why, yes, I just did.

I must admit, I have been watching—no, FOLLOWING—that show “American Chopper”. (And for that matter, I think Jay Leno’s bike “turned out awesome”, and that he doesn’t appreciate it.) Having seen that west-coast phony “Jesse James” and his show(s), his ridiculous mug on the cover of a friggin’ BOOK, for chrissakes, and just tonight having been subjected to the godawful characters (save for the family of metalworkers) on “American Hotrod”, I’m convinced that the producers of “American Chopper” are the only ones who got it right. The show is equal parts “All in the Family”, “Motorweek”, “Abbott & Costello”, “Cheers”, and, I dunno, let’s say “The Real World” (and I swear to god, I’ve only seen enough of that piece of crap to use the reference in this and the preceding sentence). The weekly trials of the Teutul family and their cohorts make for some quality entertainment. To use some good old fashioned Paul Sr. phraseology, “dis here show kicks some serious ass”.

And besides, only the OCC guys offer official bobble head dolls and an official OCC shop clock (finally!).

Maybe it’s my bicycling/mechanical background, and my appreciation for custom work. Maybe it’s the fact that Paul Sr. is Ralph Kramden, with huge tattooed guns for arms. Maybe it’s the amazing work that their too-cool-for-himself paint guy, CJ does. Maybe it’s the fact that an OCC t-shirt goes for $20.00, while a similarly cotton-comprised t-shirt bearing the emblem of that west coast chopper idiot Jesse James costs $27.00. I dunno. Maybe they’re just fun to watch, and they make cool stuff. But I enjoy watching American Chopper and I don’t give a shit who knows about it.